A Large Amount Of Tumblr Memes

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    Text - apocalyptictaurus starry-san 13,839 braavosis: sokkcoli: quietprofanity: snoipahkat: | P SURE TOPH'S DAD IS NICOLAS CAGE Son of a bil ... NO WERE NOT DOING HTIS #We're going to steal the Declaration of Ba Sing Se Source: snoipahkat MemeCentere memecenter.com
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    Text - At the Justice League Headquarters Batman: So what do you do? Aquaman: I fight all the villains of the sea. Batman: I've never heard of any villains in the sea. Aquaman: yeah Aquaman: because I do my JOB Source: thestalebread 109,503 notes
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    Text - 4:20 wolfatsuya: kasoukai: Ims if u Get this funny joke :) haha, nice math joke :) everyone should know that the ratio 4:20 should be simplified to 1:5, i get it! haha ! cool maths joke - textpost textposts textpostfunny haha funny hilarious Imao me relatable funnytextposts same humor humour tumblr tumblrfunny tumblrquotes funnyposts tagyourself funnyaccount relatableposts meme hashtag shrek textpostaccount posts funnythings dankmemes memes lol why did you read all this
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    Text - foreveralone-lyguy: pizzaforpresident: if i was trapped inside a room filled with explosives and the only way out was to eat a whole tomato i would die How the hell would you even get in that situation
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    Text - smooching-sarcasm E nutellaprince kratoast: billywilder: throughout your life people will try to tell you that puns aren't funny. these people are wrong. punish them PUNish them
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    Text - roumanian english: coconut oil french: :) english: oh boy french: oil of the nut of the coco renaissavce IM CRYINGNFN my-name-is-long english: ninety-nine french: :) english: oh no french: four-twenty-ten-nine spirited-simmer english: potato french: :) english: oh geez french: apple of the earth catchingjinns french: papillon english: :) french: don't english: beurremouche
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    Text - windy-boy: yes-im-satan: Friendly reminder that you're probably going to outlive the very celebrities you love you certainly put your url to good use
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    Text - trombona tumblr. Folow eiv chend00 how to draw a sheep: drawa doud, legs, a crde for the head and there you have a sheep ther00 someone draw a sheep using these instructions tombono nis ty helped i think this is the best sheep i have EVER draunt
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    Text - LISTEN UP I GOT A STORY TO TELL djsckatzen: sasstronauuut: falloutfrost: sasstronauuut: sasstronauuut: SO AT OUR SCHOOL THERE ARE NO PHONES ALLOWED BUT WE STILL TAKE THEM TO SCHOOL BECAUSE WE'RE FUCKING IDIOTS AND TODAY THE CLASS PRES ALMOST RAMMED THE DOOR DOWN AND YELLED "HIDE YOUR PHONES THE HEADMISTRESS WILL CHECK YOUR BAGS FOR PHONES AND TAKE THEM AWAY IF SHE FINDS THEM" AND FOR LIKE 5 SECONDS YOU COULD SEE THIRTY FACES OF PURE HORROR AND THEN PEOPLE STARTED SCREAMING AND TAKING OFF
  • 10
    Text - e-zekiel: jackwhitesturntable: tanku: this post is here to remind everybody that "gråtrunka" is the swedish word for "crying while masturbating" That's a real tear jerker Did you just
  • 11
    Child - www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/usmfy/m...> littlejesseryan: My mom asked me for a "formal picture" of my one month old baby, I sent her this. Source: sofapizza 351,326 notes
  • 12
    Text - dennys E buzzfeed Denny's Senpai has Dennys Bizzie noticed you buzzfeed: It's...it's so beautiful. This is getting out of control. And it's wonderful. #dennys #dennysdiner #buzzfeed #bennys #fan art #senpai 571 notes
  • 13
    Text - E 1squirtle 10inchflaccid: neutraldankhotel: 10inchflaccid: neutraldankhotel: you: *eats 100 ears of corn in two hours* I am the corn king! I cannot be outcorned me: *eats 101 ears of corn in ten minutes* just another day in the corn fields what? I don't know. i woke up at 6am, wrote this, and went back to sleep hope youre okay Source: neutraldankhotel #bigdoge69 194,209 notes
  • 14
    Text - Weird Science @weird_sci Some female squid wear fake testicles to avoid the advancements of male squids. 2:35 AM - Nov 22, 2016 O 6,938 Q 3,686 people are talking about this Zaria. Follow @lujuriamiu Even my ladies in the ocean can't get a break from men. Weird Science @weird_sci Some female squid wear fake testicles to avoid the advancements of male squids. 8:54 AM - 7 Dec 2016 50,561 Retweets 82,733 Likes O 80 t7 51K 83K onlyblackgirl: candiikismet: Dear God in heaven And then there are
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    Text - phonesignal: snorlaxatives: i love girls with rough and raspy voices like emma stones voice changed me as a person honestly my grandmas a chain smoker ill give you her number if you want Source: snorlaxatives 185,132 notes
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    Text - went from being Carmen "engaged" to "it's complicated." 1 hour ago - Randy its not complicated you got caught fucking numerous men 1 hour ago - Like thetoolazytothinkupacoolnameblog: becuzbacon: Tell it, Randy. Randy said fuck your bullshit STAA 2OVEL.om
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    Text - Jul 4, 2014, 9:54 PM Do you have pet insurance Jul 4, 2014, 10:31 PM Hahah uh....no, but I have considered it. Nice icebreaker. Do you? No, I had a turtle but I got him a new tank and he died of some sort of infection 3 weeks later :-( By the way, it's too bad you don't have pet insurance because your pussy is getting smashed tonight Send Message thatsnotwatyourmomsaid: christiandinoor: 69chainzzz420: Incredible 0-100 at light speed he got distracted by his own insurance tragedy but quick
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    Text - YUNO melonmemes MEME sarah marie cintron @sarahmcintron Most guys: send noodes My boyfriend: Yeah I'm showering Oh nice send me a picture of your hair up in a giant spike lol 5/2/18, 6:18 AM 98.7K Retweets 501K Likes now if this aint goals idk what is grizzlyadventures I love that she made it her twitter icon too
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    Text - "STACEY'S MOM HAS GOT IT GOIN' ON SHE'S ALL I WANT AND I'VE WAITED FOR SO LONG STACY CANT YOU SEE YOU'RE JUST NOT THE GIRL FOR ME I KNOW IT MIGHT BE WRONG BUT I'M IN LOVE WITH STACE- staceysdad started following you ...Hello...sir... P SEVOD.com The Internet Scavengers
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    Text - homophobic white girlgrant Source: hfddydf464545. idlewildly: temerairekin: lets all agree that going up stairs on all fours is actually the best experience of the whole earth Conversely, going down stairs on all fours is actually the most terrifying experience of the whole earth. 65,656 notes
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    Text - pizzaforpresident: petition to rename the usa 'south canada' what about alaska are we then normal canada canada a bit to the left Cahada a Sit to thENeft canada ATLANTIC OCEAN south canada Guif of Mexlco Caribbean Sea What about South America? Is that just America? Or South South Canada? Canada a bit to the left Canada South Canada South South Canada Canadea bir Canada More Canada South Canada East Canada Other Canada South South Canada Down Under Canada i cried my ass of laughing Baby Co
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    Text - every american ive talked to on skype asked about bagged milk so far what the hell is bagged milk? what GUYS ITS JUST MILK IN A BAG WHY IS THIS SUCH A STRANGE CONCEPT trel Oregsy Ongly BECAUSE IF YOU OPEN IT, DOESNTIT GO EVERYWHERE? HOW DO YOU EVEN #but. can't you open it like you open bagged water? WHAT THE FUCK IS BAGGED WATER
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    Text - roumanian english: coconut oil french: :) english: oh boy french: oil of the nut of the coco renaissavce IM CRYINGNFN my-name-is-long english: ninety-nine french: :) english: oh no french: four-twenty-ten-nine spirited-simmer english: potato french: :) english: oh geez french: apple of the earth catchingjinns french: papillon english: :) french: don't english: beurremouche
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    Text - Fun Fact: The average person would walk past a murderer about 36 times in their lifetime. I like how this is called a 'fun' fact. It's fun because they didn't decide to murder you.
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    Text - dustbats I'm on medication that can make me spacey af, which can be a problem when I'm driving-like yesterday, for example, when my best friend was trying to help me avoid a pothole he said "to the left," and I just mumbled "take it back now y'all" and hit the pothole straight on ten-and-donna DENRTIKGONTENT Literally crying pursuitofhapppinessss this is my favorite post on this website
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    Text - theonlyjelly-iwillput-inmybelly you know that little sea bug with the stupid hands and it has a home but it changes homes sometimes because it gets too big for it?? what is it??? soulcollectorlol Hermit crab??
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    Text - O showerthoughtsofficial Pinnocchio could tell us so much about the universe. He could randomly claim things like, "The Big Bang happened," and his nose would confirm or deny our theories. strikeyouout Pinocchio's not omniscient, you stupid fucking redditors, his nose grows when he's intentionally being dishonest. exeunt-pursued-by-a-bear things heating up in the pinocchio fandom
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    Cat - instagrarn: subwaywhore: subwaywhore: This is what happens when you spill flour on a cat I will murder you in your sleep Phantom if the opurra S unimpressedcats Source: subwaywhore 144,977 notes
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    Snout - keep-it-classy-as-fuck: iaira: weepingangelofjotunheim: invokes: princess-lullaby: spirallightofvenus: lampsarepeopletoo: thats not even a cat its like a bowling ball that is not a bowling ball it is a watermelon with fur It is a potato a furry potato Furtato nelly furtato God I love tumblr s danlhowell Source: andsuddenlycats 151,751 notes
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    Text - meladoodle i wanna be a reverse tooth fairy where i rob people and then scatter human teeth on their bed firelorcl a dentist turkey-imported-from-maine i dont know what your dentist is doing to you but i think you need to go to the police
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    Text - meladoodle i wanna be a reverse tooth fairy where i rob people and then scatter human teeth on their bed firelorcl a dentist turkey-imported-from-maine i dont know what your dentist is doing to you but i think you need to go to the police
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    Nose - stilesmcall: my dad grew this potato that looks like a shark so he stuck a paper fin in it and he's calling it Sharktato it's on a stick because he likes to move it around and sing the jaws theme song
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    Text - When seven cats all discover the same slightly elevated flat thing and claim it as their own while pretending the other six cats don't exist.
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    Text - ineedmorelube: trarnp: ineedmorelube: wakey wakey eggs and bakey but l'm a vegan wakey wakey vegetables and sadness Source: ineedmorelube
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    Text - thyrell what's the punchline here thyrell wait thyrell
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    Text - Who is Mario and Luigi's rideable sidekick? Yoshi Toad Bowser Peach seriousjones this is a matter of opinion STRANGEBEAVER.com
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    Text - cleromancy a cat: *touches me with its small hand* me: *eyes tearing up* thank you 512,669 notes
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    Text - shitmygaywifesays Follow Shit my wife has said to our cat: -You are the cause of all entropy. -I don't know how, but I'm going to blame you for all my problems. -Life on this earth is brief. -What do you think about the plight of the Jewish people, Miss Kitty? -You have to ask yourself, Miss Kitty, would your rather be comforted by a lie or strengthened by the truth? -You occupy a very small space in a very large world, but your conscience is ever the umbrella. You also have a cute kitty
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    Text - prokopetz My doctor thinks I must do yoga because I have amazing spinal flexibility for a 35-year-old, but really it's just from trying to give my cat scritches without getting up. prokopetz Like, sometimes if I lie face-down on a bed or couch, my cat will come and stand on my back, then loudly demand cuddles while refusing to move. Do you have any idea the sort of contortions that are required to give ear-scritches to a cat that's standing on your back? kayas-wife that sounds like the pe
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    Cat - Found an old PC monitor, decorated a little sweet-bitsy What website is that lord-kitschener The only good one
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    Cat - This is Hobbes. Hobbes has funny ears and mind control powers. You love Hobbes.
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    Text - thedailylaughs mole Follow kissmelou as a college student, my favorite words are "canceled" and "free" je-suis-pas-un-oiseau Free pizza is cancelled classyroar Why would you even say something like that 422,579 notes
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    Advertising - Adult cereals mecial Bes Bakery Special Strance pacifisticmatt: setbabiesonfire: brand-n3w. dyingoutsideandin: mangaka-soldier: moffats-army: 50 Shades of Grain Porn Flakes Special D Rice Frisky Captain munch Cheery Hoes Weeniabix
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    Poster - benwarheit Follow PASTA TI Things I like about this decal on a restaurant window: -the insane orange waiter -that he's carrying his plates in the air like a strongman -the couple looks like this isn't the first time he's done this, but it's easier to just let it happen at this point. -the sign says PASTA as if he's screaming it like a frankenstein -but he's holding a plate of an entire chicken and a plate of wine glasses -there's three wine glasses -one's for him. 220,418 notes
  • 45
    Text - My son's new daycare isn't fucking around with payment Payment Pracedures Parents are expected to pay weekly on Friday for the upcoming week. Payments should be given to an administrative person in the front office or dropped in the grey lockbox in the foyer. f cash payment is made a receipt must be given to validate payment and kept for your personal records. Failure to pay tuition will result in termination of youur child Initial Depanit You will be charged a deposit equal to one week o
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    Text - loveireandblog: wodenswolf: adamusprime: sending your kid to catholic school is the easiest way to guarantee your kid will not be catholic Fun story: a friend of mine discovered she was bi-sexual and into bdsm at a catholic school after a nun put her over her knee and spanked her. Christians just can't seem to get anything right. Lmfao my fave post now has an even better comment
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    Text - bunnywith: disarmonia-mundi: neonjustice: When you have your period do you ever just take a shower and stand there in the water and watch all the blood go down the drain and pretend that you just survived a gang battle an it's like a really dramatic time for you. is this what girls fucking think about we get our period one a month every month from ages 12-55 THAT'S A LOT OF FUCKING BLOOD WE MIGHT AS WELL TRY TO MAKE IT FUN
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    Text - Emily Barry @EmiBarry "Wow 3 tattoos.. those are pretty permanent you know" Me: wow 3 kids... those are pretty damn permanent CAROL thefingerfuckingfemalefury Technically both can be removed with lasers finney13s THIS MA 62,606 notes
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    Text - cknd: Am I the only one that finds it weird that I can transfer data from my brain to someone else's by opening my mouth and pushing air with vibrations in their direction. How high are you 5'4"
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    Cat - manicpixiedeathbitch: "you think this is a fucking joke?" S unimpressedcats 163,749 notes ...
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    Dog - "ONG samandriel: unamusedsloth: Day 77, no one suspects a thing. I was so focused on the one dog sitting patiently in the back that I didn't even realize S oficialfrenchtoast Source: unamusedsloth 236,816 notes
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    Text - ugly guy why isn't 11 why isn't 11 pronounced onety one Google Search I'm Feeling Lucky mindpalce: mindpalce huntereve18: carry-on-my-wayward-butt: mildly-intoxicated: my favourite picture on tumblr ever I AM LAUGHING SO HARD BECAUSE I THOUGHT OF 22 AND I SAID "TOOTY TWO" OUT LOUD AT 4AM OH GOD Threety three Fourty four I have realized my mistake 741,127 notes
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    Text - civilish: severalzygons: civilish: Do British people not drink ice tea as much as Americans do? What do they drink during the summer? tea But it's hot... only tea there are no other drinks only tea Wait... What if you don't like tea? then the weak die natural selection PASVOD.com The Internet Scavengers
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    Text - just-shower-thoughts A vanilla soy latte is a type of 3-bean soup. monsterlets
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    Text - biological-warfare: giveme-brandy-onmybreath: mitsurugi: gordonjramsay: skypestripper: aclorable: aclorable: aclorable: which country has the most birds portugeese wait thats a language portugull nice recovery don't you mean nice redovery turkey, how did we miss turkey
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    Lawn - vincentvangoth: tastefullyoffensive: "The morning dew perfectly captured my dog's erratic freedom run." Photo by Babolattack (larger version) nyoooooooom look at him go
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    Text - dean-osgirl 2 youll-be-mine-one-day Seguir me: *goes to like a post* *realises post is already liked* me: *unlikes post to like post again so it's me: higher in my rubble of likes* Fonte: beeishappy 26.007 notas
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    Photo caption - episkeyfirewhiskey.tumblr.com the-absolute-best-posts: dracosredemption: The girl next to Crabbe looks like Crabbe with a wig on. It was a tight budget
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    Face - dukedanieldantetheznd: homoofspace: homoofspace: what was the demon arrested for? possession - [forced laughing]
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    Text - ironmanstan firstborn children are the dumbest currency ever Imao what if i never planned on having a child huh? ye hi Old Witch From Forest i want abs and four billion dollars you can have all my children in return tbh ironmanstan your-villainous-neighbour I, a firstborn, was high-key confused by the first 7 or so words shut up you Dumb Currency Source: ironmanstan
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    Text - death-g-reaper I love to make up phrases and slap "if you know what I mean" on the end. It implies there's meaning to it and it leaves the recipient wondering bpdsebastian i too like to shake up the old bag of hammers if you know what i mean death-g-reaper I know exactly what you mean my dude
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    Text - obscuruslupa: heyitspj: heyitspj: Mr Krabs canonically served in the navy and fought in a war but we know nothing about that if we go by his drivers lisence BIKINI BOTTOM DRIVER LICENSE CLAS EXPIRES: 11-30-02 A5265661 MR. KRABS 3541 ANCHOR WAY BIKINI BOTTOM SEX: M HAIR: N/A EYES: GRN HT: 0-07 WT: 5 DOB: 11-30-42 Mr Hrabs krabs was born in 1942. the youngest he could have possibly been to serve in the military is 18 which he wasnt until 1960. bikini bottom uses US currency so we can safely
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    Text - what happens to nitrogen when the sun rises it becomes daytrogen I'm going to bed. good nitrogen sleep tightrogen don't let the bed bugs bitrogen
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    Mammal - kengriffey-ir: Day 42: I have infiltrated their ranks and gained their trust lolpugs 479,434 notes
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    Text - trapsical I took a shit in my grandma's cat's litterbox when I was like 13 and my whole family was wilding out trying to figure out why the cat took such a huge dump. Then they took her to the vet and we found out she has feline HIV so in a way, I helped her. tsarcasm this story was wild from start to finish .com
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    Text - feeling disappointed. 1 h Well, had to leave Deadpool shortly into the movie. Should've realized beforehand that it would've been too adult for a 9 yr old. At least the tix were only $5. Live and learn. It Like Comment Share 3 people like this. Thearu someone else say the same thing! they should give parents some type of warning or give a better rating! 1 hour ago · Like · Reply you mean like...an R rating? sinnamonrollpetricca: why are adults so stupid If only there were some type of rat
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    Text - allthemuches 2 dudes, chillin in open graves, 5 feet apart cause they're not gay thespiandipper This is actually an art piece by Miller & Shellabarger where they dug graves connected by a tunnel so they could hold hands. They are very much gay and irl married
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    Text - ima-ho-ho-ho: rneerkat: snapfox: rneerkat: meerkat: what happens to nitrogen when the sun rises it becomes daytrogen I'm going to bed. good nitrogen sleep tightrogen don't let the bed bugs bitrogen 1.1 billion dollar website 1.1 billion dollar websitrogen Laughed harder than I should have at this. Handcrafted by ShortySquid for iFunny :) O ifunny.mobi
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    Text - So there's only one channel in this motel, madeofmetals: This morning while I was getting ready I was watching Sesame Street. They were doing this bit where some clown was trying to wash his hands but kept washing his feet or his elbows and Elmo would go, "no mister noodle, your HANDS!" and all the tv kids would laugh. Around the fourth or fifth time he couldn't find his hands, I heard a grown man yell from somewhere else in the motel, "GODDAMMIT, MR. NOODLE."
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    Text - nahiri everyone in the world was an absolute dumbass until 1781 when kant invented thinking a der-hornmeister Too bad he couldn't invent something to cover up that massive forehead of his nahiri you just annihilated the entirety of western philosophy with that sentence
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    Text - 10. NASA had to relabel the penis sleeve for urinating in space suits from "small, medium, and large" to "large, gigantic, and humungous" because astronauts would only choose the large and they kept slipping off. besturlonhere: arineat: tryingtodisappearcompletely: God I hope this is true. Oh my god it is. OMFG i dropped my monster space condom for my magnum astro dong
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    Text - meathorse your heart is a muscle the size of a rat venusisfortransbians SPONGE BOB SQUARE PANTS little-rat-bastard Your brain's about four times the size of a cat's hzs-modblog SPONGE BOB SQUARE PANTS lawbreaker13 Your lungs can hold 5.5 liters of air dreamsanddabs SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS lawbreaker13 The soles of your feet can never grow hair
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    Text - therunnersam: thatfineassaliengirl: therunnersam: milliondollargf: not to be lactose intolerant but i dont know how to pronounce 80% of white names How racist. How dare you. How dare you refuse to pronounce my daughter's name. Come on, Makayleighlough, let's go home. @therunnersam on a serious note how is that said? It's pronounced "Jessica" but I like that unique spelling. e alittlestardustcaught Source: milliondollargf #i cackled
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    Text - GO TO WIKIPEDIA TO CHECKA SINGLE FACT Ω И 維 . REALIZE 3 HOURS LATER YOU KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT THE SOVIET UNION
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    Text - araitsume: ace-enjolras: I don't think writers realize that "strong female character" means "well written female character" and not just "female character who punches stuff and shoots stuff" #I don't think half the people on tumblr know the difference either
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    Text - scaredcoffeebean why glasses suck they're always dirty. like w hat the fuck what is coming into contact with my face? why are they so fucking dirty? wha t the fuck • 3D movies • dont ever fuckin lose them bc good luck tryin to find ANYTHING without them on roller coasters • idk why but like?? children really like to take them off of you??? and play with them??? wh the rain steamy bathrooms/kitchens/anywhere with an unnecessary abundance of steam • tfw u can feel ur prescription getting we
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    Text - diplobrocus 5 haldaisilme curseworm does mace work on birds wachut curseworm if a heron is attacking me will mace be an effective deterrent mahut curseworm time sensitive question please respond Source: curseworm 58,574 notes
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    Text - whalegod: tell me a secret One time during class my drama/english teacher, who's a devout vegan and all about not killing animals, accidentally stepped on a ladybug. He froze up and slowly cradles it in his hand and he was so heartbroken and started quoting Hamlet. I didn't have the heart to tell him that it was a red m&m. I can't breathe
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    Text - dumbasian why is bruno mars so weird about some girl opening her eyes while shes kissing him ive been meaning to ask this question since 2010 dumbasian Dr Phil asked: How did bruno know her eyes where open unless his where too ? this ask made me open my third eye pacificrim why the fuck is doctor phil asking you this STRANGEBEAVER.con
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    Text - avenging-sherlock e freckles-with-g..D Source: thatstoomainst.. sherrocked: todayis-nevertoolate: little-uno: thatstoomainstream: It's weird how in animals seeing ribs/collar&hip bones is considered sick or even abusive, but in people that's considered beautiful. This may have just changed my life. This is the best thing I've ever read. This is the post which helped me beat anorexia. 226,884 notes
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    Text - -sydney: 2011-06-10 19:14 My best friend just told me he's gay and idk what to do. HELP MEEEE?!?!?!?!!? Anonymous I can't help if there's no problem. Ask -sydney a question
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    Text - supremesaudi She was poetry, but he couldn't read." i-hold-the-snitch His name was jarred hes nineteen artsekey When his parents built a very strange machine dothepropaganda watch that scene dig in the dancing queen aftermath-meme aaaay macarena pearls-forehead Horrible job everyone
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    Dog - aliciaaadani: evilblogger: what an idiot. the iron isnt even plugged in he's trying and that's all that matters C honey--and-tar Source: awwww-cute 541,775 notes
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    Text - thefingerfuckingfemalefury: likeadamnfiddle: edgebug: thesarahsaurusrex: edgebug: video game: *autosaves at a weird/out of place/oddly random time* me: uh oh video game: *conveniently gives you lots of health kits and ammo* me: fuck video game: *suddenly goes uncharacteristically silent* me: shit video game: *protagonist relives happy memories nearly the end of the game* me: here it comes Video Game: Controller starts vibrating Me: WHAT'S COMING WHAT IS IT
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    Text - HERE SALE emicital prefers vaspim: meladoodle: i really want to buy one of these grocery checkout dividers but the lady behind the counter keeps putting it back This is like the most innocent joke I've ever read
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    Text - tumblr. Follow memeufacturing inspirational poster: "it doesn't matter what you look like on the outside.." me: whew!!! good inspirational poster: ".it's who you are on the inside!" me: ah fuck 100,108 notes
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    Joint - 255, 132 O kankrisvictue hombassfaervapel w THEMETAPICTURE.COM This is why I don't believe guys who tell me that the condom is too small. When I was in middle school, we had a woman come teach us about contraception, and literally the first thing she told us was 'Ladies, if a guy ever tells you he can't wear condoms because they're too small, he's lying' and then proceeded to open a condom and stretch it up her forearm up to her elbow. well clearly I've been spending too much on socks My
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    Text - me with a cursed amulet hotcoins: me: but it makes me look cute and the shadow that follows me makes me active, i get out more Source: hotcoins 79,624 notes
  • 91
    Text - frog-and-toad-are-friends: I can't wait until like twenty years after weed is fully legalized and nobody cares anymore and comedians have to make real movies with real jokes Source: frog-and-toad-are-friends 12,542 notes
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    Animal figure - officialprincewilliam: can a dinosaur even get more fuckin rad? Diae iders you bet jurassican i am so impressed by that dinosaur and that pun congratulations
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    Text - supracupra officialwhitegirls Seguir mielrosa I hate when I show my grandma a funny video/pic she asks "who is that?" I don't fucking know grandma just laugh and give me my phone back Fuente: mielrosa 7 613 notas
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    Text - Resolved Question Shov Is Fruit by the Foot Really 3 feet long? Isit really 3 feet long? me and my bff want 2 know! :) THANXI 5 years ago Olive Best Answer - Chosen by Asker haha me and my bff wanted to know the same thing and we got a ruler! yes, it is 3 feet long and we said heck yeah! Angiedol. 5 years ago P Report Abuse 2 people rated this as good Asker's Rating: ***** Thanx! :) mydogsnokes: i wish the internet was still this innocent Source: floambones 192,024 notes
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    Text - Disappearing Grandparents? no fun in the tub ?? Are pregnant women allowed to travel? I am not seeing ghosts showering in space suit Honey, the baby's in the hot tub. toripocalypse sims forum topics out of context are so hilarious
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    Text - A dajo42 [becomes supervillain] [spends the entire time giving subtle set-ups to cool lines the hero could say] whyequalsemexplusbee [Superhero is oblivious to set ups] [make their own one liners] [enrages supervillain] dajo42 me: haha! i'm sure you'll find this 10000 volt electric blast.. hero: volt-y interesting! me: what????? what the fu ck ?????? you're supposed to say shocking what the FFUCK was that Source: dajo42 53,678 notes
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    Text - partybarackisinthehousetonight give a man a guitar and he'll play for a day, teach a man guitar and today is gonna be the day that they're gonna throw it back to you madameatomicbomb I swear to God I am so tired of this meme. You guys need to leave Wonderwall alone, seriously by now you should've somehow realized what you gotta do venusian--eye i don't fucking believe this. i don't believe that anybody feels the way i do about you now Source: partybarackisin. 207,862 notes
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    Text - the-bored-cat One Day a Woman had 100 children. She sadly did not have the creativity to name all of them unique names so she named each one a number from 1-100. One of them was named "one", the next was "two" and so on all the way to one hundred. But, in a tragic accident, 99 of the children died. The only one who survived was the one named "Ninety". Ninety eventually grew up and lived a whole life and she even had a few children of her own. One day, while Ninety's children were playing
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    Text - kidzbopdeathgrips honestly dogs don't even matter once they're past the puppy stage like dogs older than that are just irrelevant.put em in the garbage basementdemo Google Canada how 2 hire a hitman immediately Google Search I'm Feeling Lucky
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    Text - letmeeatyourchildren: sherlocksmyth: THOU = "YOU" WHEN YOU'RE FUCKING DOING SOMETHING. THEE = "YOU" WHEN YOU'RE HAVING SOMETHING FUCKING DONE TO YOU. THY = "YOUR" AND "YOURS" WHEN THE THING YOU OWN BEGINS WITH A FUCKING CONSONANT. THINE = "YOUR" AND "YOURS" WHEN THE THING YOU OWN BEGINS WITH A FUCKING VOWEL. IF YOU'RE GOING TO MAKE SHITTY OLD ENGLISH TEXT POSTS, DO IT RIGHT. Thine octopus
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    Text - Funny Tumblr Pos By Gten11 fi cut off my foot and swing it at your head a kicking or hitting you FIl most likely mentally more than anything
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    Text - exeggutor everyone who died at the battle of hogwarts missed All Star by Smash Mouth's release two days later hisnamewasbeanni It's so tragic, they still had so much to do, so much to see Source: exeggutor 153,600 notes
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    Text - simonwang: where can I uninstall my period i think if you download pregnancy it blocks it for a few months but then you get a really annoying loud pop up that doesn't go away for 18 years simonwang 494,864 notes Jun 9th, 2017 ...
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    Text - pulpofiction: Life hack: if someone makes a racist/sexist joke, say, with total seriousness, "I don't get it, can you explain it" Then watch them crash and burn 3 siriuslymeg Source: steinbecks 915,370 notes Jul 10th, 2018 boredpanda.comn
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    Text - porrim-some-sugar-on-me: lock-lamora: duhpercy: ads for pads these days are all about how thin and discreet pads are and how no one will ever be tell you're wearing them WELL HOW ABOUT YOU MAKE THE PACKAGING QUIETER BECAUSE THERE'S NO FUCKING POINT IN HAVING A THIN DISCREET PAD WHEN EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU RIPPING ONE OPEN IN THE SCHOOL BATHROOM Use the men's room they won't expect it 'Who the fuck is eating chips in here?" a kaeandlucy 381,601 notes Jun 9th, 2017
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    Text - super-who-locked-in: angle-of-depression: nothingcorporate: opinions on abortions are kinda like nipples everyone has them but women's are a little bit more relevant But all you ever see are men's Oh shit S ariaste Source: uncooler boredpanda.com 956,191 notes Jul 10th, 2018
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    Text - Man: How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? One. She holds the bulb and waits for the world to revolve around her. Me: How many misogynists does it take to change a light bulb? None. They can't handle change, even if it makes the world a brighter place. E shadowlhunters boredpanda.com 308 notes Apr 24th, 2018
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    Text - LOL, SO TRUE: POST #782 When my favorite character in a TV show is killed off: lol-sotrue.tumblr.com
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    Text - * 86% 000 Optus 3G 17:56 1ODAY I MADE A TWITTER ACCOUNT FOR A BAGEL simple bagel @simplebagel hello it is i a simple bagel Expand BUT I GOT TOO EXCITED AND STARTED FAVORITING ALL THE TWEETS CONTAINING THE WORLD "BAGEL" SO TWITTER SUSPENDED ME AND I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO SO I SENT THEM THIS EMAIL Aerial to Twitter give me my account back and there's more where that came from ) selfie.png 238K View Share Downloar AND THEY UNSUSPENDED ME VIA THEMETAPICTURE.COM
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    Text - Yinka @yeancarrh Guys, at age 25, you should already have an apartment of your own, and at least 2 cars. Turoboye @sixtiesbreed "Jesus Christ is 2000 years old and still lives in his father's house. Don't stress me please" EVERYTHINGFUNNY.ORG
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    Text - LOL, THAT'S ME: POST #9 That moment when you're sitting next to your crush: lolthatsme.tumblr.com
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    Text - newyork_ink I been Alive for 25 Years Never Seen A Chinese Restaurant Commercial EVERYTHINGFUNNY.ORG
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    Text - broughttoyoubytheletterq: theleeryone: broughttoyoubytheletterq: what do you call a dictionary on drugs If you say addictionary I swear to fucking god I will cut you I was gonna say 'high definition' but yours is better
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    Text - feedthemonkeysomesouffles: itslikethatfrenchthing: scienceing: scienceing: | my friend was cold so I told her to stand in a corner corners are 90 degrees I had to lean back in my chair and stare out the window for several minutes because I am so done with this website.
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    Text - targuzzler what if mayonnaise came in cans smeasel that would suck because you can't microwave metal... phisobi good morning to everyone except these two people Source: targuzzler 188,858 notes
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    Text - officertoast: officertoast: I JUST SWALLOWED THE WIRE FROM MY BRACE PLEASE HELP mccurlehpants said: i was gonna say 'brace yourself but it appears you've already swallowed that pun DO NOT
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    Text - Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side No, to get to your house!! Okay that was bad, try this one. Knock knock Who's there? THE CHICKEN ВАНАНАНАННАНАНННА ННААНАНАННАНАНАНА НАНА Delivered iMessage Send
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    Recipe - any cookie is bite sized if you try hard enough ANY COOKIE IS BITE SIZED IF YOU TRY HARD ENOUGH I started school today - DM memes-text posts to be featured • +++++ funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrposts funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrpost memeaccount joke jokes lol hilarious hilariousmemes funnyaccount funnyposts hehe haha cleanaccount cleanhilarious funnyaccount funnytumblr relatable
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    Text - heymarinaa x0danielle E lovemetoinfinity: fatdough: rewind-and-restart: mountincest: school doesnt even test your intelligence it tests your memory it tests my patience it tests my ability to hold my pee it tests my ability to keep calm and not slap a bitch 675,148 notes
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    Ear - doll-frakking-house meggiephyllis D Source: lifemadesimple Earphones straight down Earphones over-the-ear berks-dragon-trainer: madnesswithasideofsanity: lifemadesimple Helps to reduce the vibrations that travel through the cord and into the earbuds. Personal opinion: It's more comfortable for extended periods of time, and helps to keep the ear buds secure in your ears when walking around. i honest to god thought "but won't the music be upside down?" BUT WON'T THE MUSIC BE UPSIDE DOWN 118,
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    Text - friend-called-boxcar who was the fool who was tasked with naming the galaxy and the only adjective they could think of was 'mmmmmmmmmmmmilky. skazuhira-miller scientist: (gazing up at space) . it sure is a milky boy scientist: freshfriedtrash NO YOU DONT UNDERSTAND ASTRONOMERS ARE THE SHITTIEST EVER AT NAMING THINGS I KID YOU NOT. When it came time to name the two theoretical particle types that might be dark matter THEY INTENTIONALLY CHOSE THE NAMES SO THAT THE ACRONYMS WOULD SPELL "WIMP
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    Text - Bacteria The anly culture some people have furfrouprincess: gingerblivet: R..... ............ .. molecularlifesciences: ................ . angelicinnovator: ***** .********************* Biologists are jerks. Our sense of humor is infectious. This needs to go viral. I'm sick with laughter
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    Text - imanes me: im bored what should i do my brain: here's something productive that u have been procrastinating on doing for literally three mont- me: haha u wild. anyways only realistic suggestions please Source:imanes 187,232 notes
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    Text - russiacore why the fuck is no one naming their children after greek goddesses? Name your fucking child Persephone?????? Bitch???????!? nerdwarningalert If that makes you happy, my name is Demeter thecaffeinebookwarrior In my experience, people named after Greek goddesses are some of the most ethereal, chaotic forces I have ever encountered. Our Art Department's nude model, for example, is a woman named Hera. She's stunningly beautiful, rides a motorcycle as apparently her only vehicle, gr
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    Text - Strange Fruit. @LaEtchi If I'm "cockblocking" my friend it's because she wants me to do it, trust me lol 09/04/2014 13:55 gordoananke: ohhmelancholy: misunderst00dsOul: jovbeeeez: guys never realize that. Why play games though? Just come out and say no, don't seem to hard. cause the word "no" is not in y'all's vocabulary. schibichanga Source: jay-escobar 1,122,602 notes
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    Font - WE ALREADY HAVE UNIVERSAL HEALTHCARE GUN OWNER O VICTIM HOOSE ITS CALLED OWNING A GUN ! comcastkills I literally can't figure out what this means. kittenfossils i didn't even know this could help me. i'm going to shoot the autoimmune disorder out of me leecario Doctor: you have the flu Me cocking my gun: like hell I do
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    Text - shimshim7 FOLLOW Namjoon: (sneezes) Namjoon: Namjoon: ..your 'e not even gonna say "bless you"?!?! Jin: ..I'm sitting here with you. You're clearly already BEEN blessed soo #bts #bts would you rather #bts reactions #bts imagi 3,428 notes
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    Text - noncanadiansatan: bertismylife: vickisaurusrex: cute names for ur newborn child o yeehaw o hte Spaghetti o lil shit o swiggity swoner i have a boner o genocide come on ("), we're gonna be late how is that pronounced ("I) 24 Hilarious Tumblr Posts That Are Trending All Over The Internet #FUNNY #funnymemes #memes #lol #humor #ladnow #sarcasm #haha #rofl #Imao
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    Text - diplobrocus 5 haldaisilme curseworm does mace work on birds curseworm if a heron is attacking me will mace be an effective deterrent curseworm time sensitive question please respond Source: curseworm 58,574 notes
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    Text - in movies: person: *sees blood stain* person: *touches it* person: person: person: person: blood Source: ororomunroe-archive 325,506 notes
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    Text - Matt Tobey @mtobey "Anybody here named Jeff?" Jeff: "Yes" Geoff: "Yeos" 11:02 am 21 Jan 16 jeoff: | fuck this post
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    Text - unclefather: unclefather: at my funeral there is going to be a closed casket and then it will be opened to reveal that i am not inside. instead, they will turn on the ceiling fan and my lifeless body will swing around the room while the space jam theme song is playing in the background. nevermind, my mom says i can't do that. 279,642 notes
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    Text - *on Ellen* ELLEN: so i hear u tweet about wanting to die ME: haha yeah, i do *Death comes out, creeps up behind me* ME: omg ellen you didnt
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    Text - sherlockisthenight: bandannarama: iamtonysexual: biptch: don't make me snap my fingers in a z formation hip rotation booty sensation ETERNAL DAMN ATION *snaps fingers in a pentagram formation* *says a Latin incantation* *sacrifices a virgin to the dark lord Satan*
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    Font - yield stop go but on bananas it's just the opposite hold on go ahead what unsexual: wynderbar: | i will never get sick of this what STRANGEBEAVER.com
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    Text - immortal-activist 2 pickle-dickle O Source: rubee carry-on-my-wayward-butt: clannyphantom: rubee: I HEARD A DOG BARK TODAY AND I BARKED BACK AND IT REPLIED THE EXACT SAME WAY AND WE WENT BACK AND FORTH UNTIL MY FRIEND TOLD ME THAT IT WAS JUST MY VOICE ECHOING AND I HAD BEEN BARKIG BY MYSELF FOR 5 MINUTES STRAIGHT BUT WHO BARKED THE FIRST TIME The TWILIGHT ZONE 73,135 notes
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    Text - Moniquel I hope Mrs. Johanson is at the reunion, she was the best teacher/my favorite of all of CHS! Wednesday at 3:13pm Like Comment Subscribe O 4 people like this. YAYA! i had her too! Thomas Wednesday at 4:14pm - Like Larry a bitch cuz of her i had 2 take summer school!! WTF that lady was youre favorite teacher?!? she Wednesday at 6:12pm Like Johanson Sadly, I will not be able to attend, but thank you all for inviting me to the group. Larry, I am sorry you feel that way. Obviously my g
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    Text - Lexi Tiffany about an hour ago near Richland 2 I do not understand the thinking process of a males brain.... at all. Like · Comment Unfollow Post Agenat Eolhc, Alex Samoray, McKenzie Kennedy and 3 others like this. Jake Zoulek Because your blonde? about an hour ago · Like 1 Lexi Tiffany You're" about an hour ago · Like 3 10
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    Text - A shuckl could i pay someone to take over my body who actually knows how to look after it so they can like, make me healthy again and then let me take over once i'm fit n healthy wildyOungbeautiful You mean a personal trainer and a nutritionist shuckl no i mean some sort of supernatural being who can do literally all of the work for me mrcomatoseoverthr So like the ghost of a personal trainer and nutritionist Source: aidn 404,068 notes
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    Text - buckkybbarnes wait hogwarts was established in the 10th century but sinks were not invented until the 18th century so how did salazar slytherin mark the chamber of secrets with a form of indoor plumbing which would not be invented for another 800 years ????? Z sammit-damn *looks for historical inconsistencies in a book about wizards* Source: bonesleo 362,429 notes
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    Text - Trending story detected by TrendolizerTM 2018-04-01 13:11:39 (UTC) 391 likes/shares/comments (180/hr) 19 Hilarious Tumblr Posts About Cats That Are Way Too Funny To Miss Source: cheezburger.com URL: http://cheezburger.com/5186053/19-hilarious-tumblr-posts-about-cats-that-are-way-too-funny
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    Text - Trending story detected by TrendolizerTM 2018-12-23 02:17:53 (UTC) 830 likes/shares/comments (66/hr) 19 Random, Funny, Or Weird Tumblr Posts We Saw This W Source: www.buzzfeed.com URL: https://www.buzzfeed.com/catesish/19-random-funny-or-weird-tumblr-posts-we-saw-this-week
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    Text - theacenightwatch: deans-pudding kujider cumber-collectable: sammycasdean: todiscardanddiscover deans-pudding: petition to call the food side of tumblr yumblr why did no one ever think of this before and the porn side cumblr ? and the music side humblr? whoa what have I started Punblr.
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    Text - lumos5001 2 darkarchermerlyn thetechnicolortrenchcoat: Today is Copernicus's 541th birthday. You may remember Copernicus as the man who said "Hey, what if the Earth went around the sun?" To which the Catholic Church replied “Hey, what if we set you on fire?" #history brought to you by tumblr 168,572 notes
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    Cartoon - I told you to wear Protection out here today க க
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    Text - awkwardpancakequeen 2 heckless Follow I have died every day waiting for you. nayx: every time i see this i lose my mind Source: meme4u 509,526 notes
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    Text - jeff from target @ltsJeffLe TARGET PUT MY ASS TO WORK SMH I JUST WALKED IN WITH A RED SWEATER I'm fucking wearing a red sweater and khakis and target put my ass to work smh and gave me a name badge I'm currently scanning shit
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    Text - slothmaggedon >be me >about 13 years old >basically naivete incarnate still >just discovered the world of fanfiction.net >have an account and a few stories posted so far >currently working on a fanfic of Spirited Away >get a comment one day >commenter asks if I can put lemons in my story >l think it's an odd request but will do anything to please a fan >write the next chapter acknowledging the lemon request and say that the chapter WILL CONTAIN LEMONS >about halfway through the chapter I
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    Text - fistinginferno had a dream that i was getting sorted at hogwarts but i got into an argument with the sorting hat so he made up an entirely new house called 'GrungleBunk' just so i would be forced to sit by myself in the dining hall for the rest of my life Fonte: fistinginferno
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    Text - hellaiiyo: We were driving past a cemetery and my Dad said in a dead serious quiet voice "I know something you don't know about this place. The people living in this town aren't allowed to be buried here." And I was really confused so I asked why and he said "Because they're still alive." Fuck you, Dad, with your creepy Dad jokes.
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    Text - fistinginferno jack black is literally the only human that never needs any context for me. I could see him going anywhere and doing anything. like if i got abducted by aliens and saw him just wandering around the spaceship putting bugle chips on his fingers to make it look like he has claws i would be like 'that's some classic jack black right there' and not even question it
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    Text - laurendestefano 100-200 years ago, people ate organic unprocessed food and didn't have vaccines and lived to the ripe old age of died in childbirth Source: laurendestefano 326,842 notes
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    Product - iwannapushyourdaisies: "i hate cats, they're so pretentious and stupid" me: S iwannapushyourdaisies 320,198 notes
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    Text - do australians feel love? No its too hot to feel anything when our neighbor is the fucking sun. Love is for weaklings who've never had to walk ten kilometres to school under the burning sun during dropbear mating season. the only love we know is that which exists between beer and mouth Vegemite has a chemical in it that destroys the ability to feel love. Australian children are fed on a diet of it when they are born so that they will not be affected when their peers die from heat, drop be
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    Text - vilepluff here's a funny for you. I identify as an attack helicopter FUNNY my pronouns are GOFUNNY/FuckFUNNy/YourselfFUNY. pro logic. Funny. FUNNY. REBLOG IF YOU WERE TRIGGERED. chuck-e-cheese-anime-faces FUNNY Mother o' God this had me goin' hogwild!!! Everybody needs to get a lesson or two on humor and reblog this gatdang post right now!!!!!!!! !!!! ! I don't care 'bout your "preshus widdle feelin's" and all your "trigger warnings" everybody needs to chuckle up!!!!!!!I don't care what r
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    Text - calliopesragingboner: one-hamburger: dicksp8jr: fionaaelizabeth: If corals get stressed they die, so if I was coral I would be dead what do coral even get stressed about Current events Get out. 552,858 notes
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    Text - coolkidsofhistory Don Featherstone, Creator of the Plastic Lawn Flamingos, 1957 eldritchcuddlernonsense He looks exactly as you would picture the creator of plastic lawn flamingos to look.
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    Text - sharkchunks tumblr. Follow E meltdowncityqueen ADVERTISEMENT Ready to be a Pastor? christianeducation.com Earn a Degree in Pastoral Studies At Home! Take the First Step Today. Horse Dildos sexbarnmegastore.it/Horse_dong Gigantic Horse Dildos at reduced prices. These things will damage you. sharkchunks "Two roads diverged in a wood, andl- I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference."-Robert Frost Source:blameaspartame 346,112 notes
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    Text - England in the 1800s This land is my land And so is this land This is all my land And you get no land #hahaa #history jokes 27,492 notes
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    Text - immortal-activist 2 pickle-dickle O Source: rubee carry-on-my-wayward-butt: clannyphantom: rubee: I HEARD A DOG BARK TODAY AND I BARKED BACK AND IT REPLIED THE EXACT SAME WAY AND WE WENT BACK AND FORTH UNTIL MY FRIEND TOLD ME THAT IT WAS JUST MY VOICE ECHOING AND I HAD BEEN BARKIG BY MYSELF FOR 5 MINUTES STRAIGHT BUT WHO BARKED THE FIRST TIME The TWILIGHT ZONE 73,135 notes
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    Dog breed - He's scared of the mirror epicfunnypage • Follow epicfunnypage Imao ! @pubity was voted 'best meme account on instagram' for credit please email Load more comments esther.bijlsma @iristerpstra ohhh kijk dan iristerpstra @esther.bijlsma Wat een schatje! miavinueza Oh my god l'm dead the puppies so cute!!!! lexi_eglon @_jodie_metson._ beccahoran8833 @prncs_photography2 edencate61 @cmillsapps damonbenson_31 @kaitlyn_prow emelie.sundqvist @lettucegobananas42 523,905 views FEBRUARY 22 Add
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    Text - friendlyneighbourhoodpizzaman: friendlyneighbourhoodpizzaman: Jesus fuck okay so I'm a waitress at this restaurant that's open really late and it's nearly 1am and this family comes in and I'm so tired that I handed their BLIND SON a menu and he's like "ah... thank you... 'll just... read this" in a serious voice and I fucking snorted GOD DAMN IT I PUT THEIR FUCKING FOOD DOWN AND NO ONE WAS TALKING SO THIS LIL SHIT FUCKING EXCLAIMS "WELL IT LOOKS DELICIOUS" I LOVE THIS FUCKING KID
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    Text - midnighttoons: Sent Tuesday, August 22, 2017 6:52 PM Subject Free pdf of the textbook Attachment Rebecca L Stein, Philip Stein The Anthropology of Religion, Magic, and Witchoraft.pdf Yo whaddup classmates this is ya boi Gary Oak, here's the textbook for free, smell ya later so a mystery student just emailed my entire class a free pdf version of our textbook and left probably the best email ive ever seen
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    Green - doughfox: exhausted-trashgoddex: when it takes you a while to process what someone is saying and you realize they asked you a question ОН I cannot fucking believe I am drunk, past midnight, and tumblr is throwing fucking saturated fatty-acids at me Listen here friendo I didn't sit through a year of organic chemistry for you to come into my house and call a carboxylic acid a saturated fatty acid you respect that hexadecanoic acid
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    Text - womaninthewoods: pickledpennies: clype: have you noticed that when someone goes 'i was bitten by a dog once and now I'm kinda wary around them' most people are like 'aw, I understand' but if a woman says she's been raped/abused by men in the past and is now scared of them she gets told she's paranoid and needs to get over it? I noticed that. have you noticed that when a dog bites a person, it gets put down ^ that last comment tho s phantom-jellyfish Source: clype-blog 823,209 notes
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    Text - It's a Tampon. You shove it up your vagina. TAMPAX TAMPAX LOLY TACO .COM tyleroakley: Let's not beat around the bush here... OR SHALL WE?! Why the fuck is she cuddling with Tampax at what appears to be a pool that is also the ocean? I want a tampon commercial where the women are fighting zombies or some shit. And they're all beat up and bloody and shoving tampons into bullet wounds to stop the bleeding. And I want one of the ladies to full-on decapitate a zombie with a machete or maybe a
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    Text - piratequeenintraining: College students only have 2 levels of stress: 1) I don't give a fuck 2) OH MY GOD IF I CAN'T DO THIS MY LIFE IS OVER I'M GONNA HAVE TO WORK AT MCDONALDS There is no in between. Source: piratequeenintraining 181,151 notes
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    Text - klefable i love little kids that share too much information. today a girl came in with her mom to order food and i told her i liked her dress. she said "thanks my mom stole it from target" #oh okay 44,979 notes
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    Text - captainsnoop enecoo What arealsetofbadonkers please.. explain cells at work is an anime about anthropomor- phic cells living in a human body, depicted as a large city otaku on 4chan watched the show and, in a desire to make the cells in their bodies happy, have started to live healthier lives
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    Text - fuckjerry Follow d-nice fuckjerry Stole my move Load more comments @Stellacopter mrsmelp @payownee daddyescobar13 Tupperware bukakke? alexandriagebby @kay_geb Sometimes I just open up the cabinet sheasley12 @cleeheasley timiswayup @andreaaaorozco me this morning and let the Tupperware hit me in the laurlaur226 @hliz123 evelinesly1 Hello friends, Let's have fun with me! Watch my p*rn videos and pictures in snapchat stories face on purpose. gi_jodes @christine.bellucci 9/18/16, 4:50 PM samk
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    Text - ? 9:07 PM 47% i. AT&T Momma Edit Messages Are u sore Do ducks have jackets Did muck save maggots Ughhhh Does husk make gaggles Never mind what what...I just..what. Send
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    Text - bull-shipping what are the strongest days of the week? bull-shipping saturday and sunday. the rest are weekdays. bull-shipping stop unfollowing me Source: 43ketchup 366,324 notes
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    Text - All a girl meeds My SWAG Hinhees IT LOOKS LIKE HE PHOTOSHOPPED THE HAT ON HIS HEAD AND I CANT STOP LAUGHING ALSO, GUESS WHAT I MANAGED TO FIND ON GOOGLE? ITS EVEN IN THE SAME ANGLE AND EVERYTHING. HE ACTUALLY PHOTOSHOPPEDA HAT ON HIS HEAD. WHY OMFG. АНАНАНАНАНА АНАНАНАНААНААНА EMON ALL A BO2 NP3DZ IS Mi SWAG
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    Text - Anonymous said when do you feel the most beautiful? F pearlkillers when a dog pulls on his leash on the sidewalk because he wants to come say hi to me
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    Text - larrys27tattoos: whatisonyobiscuit: starrysleeper: tribblesexual-jotunn: thelilnan: I am really bothered by the fact that basically the only reason why gay marriage is illegal is because some people think it's disgusting. You know, I think peas are disgusting but we're noT MAKING THAT ILLEGAL ARE WE what's wrong with you peas are delicious gay people are delicious too no dessert for you until you eat all your gays what the fuck just happened here be quiet and eat your gays
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    Text - saranthropology: k-lionheart: madsmikklsen: i love how men mock women for being overemotional and then lose their shit over a team losing an over-glorified game of fetch i have found my purpose in life and it is spreading this message over-glorified game of fetch e saranthropology Source: daisyridly 614,450 notes
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    Text - Let me ask my mom for permission first sugarpumpkin: if someone asks for nudes just tell them this and they'll leave you alone S sugarpumpkin 149,916 notes
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    Text - alternativewalls: foodchewer: reallylameblog: foodchewer: i cant express how much i hate fucking bees then stop fucking bees???? it's really a simple solution YOU KNOW WHAT I MEANT Not after bee movie we don't e lokisflowergirl Source: foodchewer boredpanda.com 256,584 notes Jun 6th, 2018
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    Text - "Couple was in therapy because neither one of them enjoyed sex. After having them talk through step by step what they did in bed, doctor learned that.."
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    Leg - This truly scared me. I thought the legs were some crispy burnt up Bo human legs
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    Text - Google what kind of owl was hedwig Web Shopping More Images Maps Videos About 772,000 results (0.36 seconds) Did you mean: what kind of owl is hedwig lydiargnt: Google is still in denial 3 howaminotdead-yet Source: hollandrodsen 455,677 notes
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    Text - bea @crazyfilipinooo COLLEGE APPLICATIONS SHOULD BE FREE. WHY SHOULD I PAY TO BE REJECTED?! Favorite More Delete Reply 110 106 RETWEETS FAVORITES gallifrey-feels: falsecatalyst: darkhopesandbrightnightmares: asyourshadowfalls: thecrazyfilipino: just saying wait...they're not free? Not in America Wait, where are they free? literally everywhere else 2 smosh Source: thecrazyfilipino 815,544 notes May 8th, 2017
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    Photo caption - IF WOMEN RULED THE WORLD THERE WOULD BE NO WARS. JUST A BUNCH OF COUNTRIES NOT TALKING TO EACH OTHER
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    Dog breed - My face when I see the waiter coming with my food funnymemes • Follow funnymemes Moood where my food at Load more comments mr.zaan @_iamlazy_ avrizag @_amitkeren_ _amitkeren_ @avrizag true sophiafranzen @shirin23111410 ivan_mancilla @kerenelvira Imao e.m.i.l.y_m.c.k.a.y @madison.mckay xsiennab @seppie1234 NACHO seppie1234 @xsiennab hahahahahah echt he jacked_mr.clean_ @hillary_dann kelseynichollsx @cyalwake you earlier cyalwake @kelseynichollsx I was buzzing my chops off. Like you wh
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    Text - When girls are off their period. doctorshuntersanddetectives: lilgarre: raymusik: So accurate it hurts s periodhumor Source: sir-ray-croft 389,707 notes Jun 9th, 2017
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    Jeans - One time I got really worried cause I was on my period for 20 days but then I checked and it had only been 4 hours
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    Text - superherotimelorddetective: choc-o-late: est-offensa-et-mirari: deppsydoodle: deppsydoodle: why is peter pan always flying? he neverlands I love this joke because it never grows old It has a nice hook This doesn't make sense. I'm lost, boys s lotstradamus Source: deppsydoodle 718,319 notes Feb 28th, 2017 ...
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    Text - lights-over-arbys: rubynrags: Do you know what I want to see? I wanna see a really cool Disney princess who can't sing. I wanna see this pretty young girl who sounds like a beached whale when she tries to sing "Happy Birthday." And none of the musical numbers feature her because she doesn't sing. But halfway through the movie, she figures out She can rap like hell This post kept getting better and better with every word S phil-the-stone Source: rubynrags 750,458 notes Feb 28th, 2017 ...
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    Cartoon - No fool, we're gonna kill him. You little fool! Silence, you old fool! I'm not going to drop it, you fool! The blundering fool! FOOLS! Shut up, shut up, You pitiful, insignificant, fool! You'l be sorry, you dols! you fools! cookie-moi: disneydeviants: How to be evil: 1. Call everyone a fool. cookie-moi Source: disneydeviants 291,029 notes Feb 28th, 2017 17
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    Text - redrainyumbrella: kurtofskyforlife: disneyismyescape: Fun Disney Fact! Fiona was the first red-headed Disney Princess when she made her debut in 1988, one year before Ariel did in The Little Mermaid (1989)! Shrek came out in 2001 Good for him. iwillmindfuckyou Source: disneyismyescape 209,874 notes Feb 28th, 2017 ...
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    Text - guitarheroism Follow anne: hey man what do you wanna eat venom: THE SOULS OF THE INNOCENT eddie: a bagel venom: NOOO eddie: two bagels
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    Text - HOLD ON, I GOT THIS HAS ANYONE SEEN AMERICA АНЕМ. PBLL NYE THE SCENCE GUYS BILL! BILL! (i1118 BILL! Why is the USA like this- 0. +++++ funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrposts funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrpost memeaccount joke jokes lol hilarious hilariousmemes funnyaccount funnyposts hehe haha cleanaccount quotes books fangirl fangirling harrypotter bookstagram book fandom
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    Text - 351,876 whips-and-waistcoats 2 deanfrickingwinchester O seeminglydeepstatement somefantasticallies: Vivalatrench: mrsugarpink: rapewhistled: followmehome: It's not "bacon," it's a pig. It's not "veal," it's a calf. It's not "steak," it's a cow. It's not "meat," it's an animal... its not "fruit", its dividing cells that accumulate fructose... it's not delivery. it's digiorno. It's not a scene, it's a god damn arms race It's not "levioSA", it's "leviOsa" Maybe it's Maybelline THIS IS SPARTA
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    Text - * chadleymacguff nosdrinker: retrospectroverted: nosdrinker: why does one ply toilet paper exist i honestly prefer single ply, it feels lighter and more effective and the rolls last longer because the sheets are thinner. ok poophands 260,250 notes
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    Text - pizzaforpresident: I petition to rename the usa 'south canada' what about alaska are we then normal canada canada a bit to the left Cahada a oit to thENeft canada ATLANTIC OCEAN south canada Gulf of Mexdco Caribbean Ser What about South America? Is that just America? Or South South Canada? Canada bit to the left Canada South Canada South South Canada Canedeir Ohe left Canada More Canada South Canada East Canada Other Canado South South Canada Down Under Canada i cried my ass of laughing B
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    Text - whatlander i guess the real question is how can you not like tesla he thought women would eventually rule the world because we're the dominant sex he liked pigeons he was a vegetarian he was a babe he was shy he hated edison he's perfect Yup, as long as you're ok with that time he went bonkers and tried to build a death ray. Are you serious the death ray was the best part
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    Text - 257,412 om-i-chaos = livesindreams My mom is yelling at my brother and I overheard this. Mom: GO TO YOUR ROOM Brother: that's not fair Mom: DO ASI SAY. Brother: You never send Lizzie to her room when she's in trouble!! Mom: Lizzie never leaves her room. If she were in trouble l'd make her sit in the living room or go outside or talk to human beings. Me: I CAN HEAR YOU. MemeCenterae memecenter.com
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    Product - james-p-sullivan: gothams-arkham-asylum: james-p-sullivan: james-p-sullivan: james-p-sullivan: | HELP IM LOST AT IKEA update: im trying to find an employee update: EMPLOYEE IS JUST AS LOST AS I AM Did you find your way out? no the employee and i have been camping out in the bed section living off of discarded meatballs and the tears of lost children Source: james-p-sullivan MameCenter memecenter.com
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    Text - seriousjones "what do you do when you stay up all night on your computer?" About 146,000,000 results (0.43 seconds) Images for horse with guns attached
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    Text - historianista: owlapin: owlapin: owlapin: MICROSOFT WORD HAS A FUCKING "INSERT CITATION" BUTTON WHY THE FUCK DID NO ONE EVER TELL ME THIS IS SIGNIFICANT INFORMATION FUCK THE SCHOOL SYSTEM THIS IS MICROSOFT WORD 2007 I SHOULD HAVE BEEN MADE AWARE OF THIS IN HIGHSCHOOL WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK I HATE EVERYTHING you can fucking log your sources into your document and then at the end press a fucking button and it makes a bibliography page for you im References Mailings Review View Add-Ins Acrob |
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    Cat - lounare: don't you dare tell me cats are not useful DON'T YOU DARE S lounare 39,274 notes OF्U göd fcg geradlinig
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    Technology - ERD EXIT LAT CRLNNE chekhov: deepbreathsanddeath: This is a real panda! China has this "panda diplomacy" and this one will be sent to Japan as an friendship envoy. For the safety reason he sits as a passenger with his feeder, not in a cage. Fastening the seat belt, wearing a diaper, eating bamboos You can't bring a full shampoo bottle on a plane but you can bring a bear? S fighter4lyf Source: jijie-jurassic 469,641 notes
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    Fictional character - Flash, take the controls." But does anyone ask if I know how? alliebeemac: What it feels like to enter adulthood.
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    Newspaper - Erentonian Treston Cops: 4-YEAR-OLD SHARES COCAINE D3 Dad told him it was candy AT DAY CARE ADS RUTGERS p17 kushh420 What a good friend
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    Text - lydiallama: today my army friend was telling us about basic training and drill sergeants and there was this kid in her battalion who asked so many stupid questions that the drill sergeant made him carry around a potted plant all day to replace the oxygen he wasted
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    Text - Your Password Hint is: you know oldlunchmeat im gunna go back in time and kick my own ass Source: oldlunchmeat
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    Room - therealhamster: i am here s catsareassholes Source: vonmunsterr 69,276 notes
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    Cat - cuddlepunch: This just in: he's figured out where the laser comes from. S cuddlepunch 321,176 notes
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    Product - immortal-activist damn-it-joel D Source: thewhatever Adult cereals Bakery Kalleg's Special BRGE justinneedstoshutup: dyingoutsideandin: mangaka-soldier: moffats-army: 50 Shades of Grain Porn Flakes Special D Rice Frisky Raisin bran.
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    Photo caption - 2 fuckyeahloldemort damn the pope about to preach some sick verses the guy beatboxing behind him "the guy" is the italian president P-Francis and the Prez 87,065 notes
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    Text - larrys27tattoos: whatisonyobiscuit: starrysleeper: tribblesexual-jotunn: thelilnan: I am really bothered by the fact that basically the only reason why gay marriage is illegal is because some people think it's disgusting. You know, I think peas are disgusting but we're noT MAKING THAT ILLEGAL ARE WE what's wrong with you peas are delicious gay people are delicious too no dessert for you until you eat all your gays what the fuck just happened here be quiet and eat your gays
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    Eyelash - "boys prefer girls that."
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    Text - potato S potato stephaniexwins I made stew. It was awesome. I love potatoes. potato i luv u too potato wait what was in the stew Source: stephaniexwins 32,908 notes
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    Cartoon - Brutus: let's go to the senate Caesar: wait what's that knife Brutus: petea toolt y voipus Inte history jokes •..... meme memes lol Imao funny tumblr instagram instagood instapic picture dankmemes dankmeme tweet post twitter text textpost textposts historymemes history
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    Screenshot - sandy jaynee teblogged awanker: 2011-09-28 19:20 WHITE GIRL PROBLEMS FOX11 STOLEN PONY NEWS ATYLOLAMOLLE setesturanicks tumble.cam- Source: detectivensciks. votum: 2011-09-28 19:20 im free L0tum.tumbl.com
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    Text - So it is very possible he just has messy handwriting (look at how he's holding the pen) and is in fact taking notes. Or he could just be doodling. I've never seen Russian cursive and now I can't stop laughing. This kind of thing is why cursive is a horrible idea. Hamane emeer Audvaroe , Teseme KEndu bonie, odnae cnocodcN किषिशिय िरि Russian doctors notes written in cursive. Pretty sure Putin is actually taking notes. My eyes.. i guess their writing looks like they were rushin STOP
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    Text - ackermom julius caesar's assassination was the last time everyone in a group project did their part hhelenoftroy apart from the fact that 60 people agreed to stab him and he only had 23 stab wounds vaeveritas Sounds about right
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    Text - stevenfresco: stevenfresco: it's 2013 why can't i delete friends in real life ok so it turns out what i was thinking of is called murder
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    Text - Manatee woman punched sister during fight over vibrator, deputies say Posted: Dec 10, 2014 5:43 PM CET Updated: Dec 10, 2014 5:50 PM CET By WFLA.com web staff ghostdaddotcx: brainstatic: lord-kitschener: I Florida On the Cracked podcast they were talking about why we get so much crazy news trom Florida. Apparently most states have laws that conceal details about crimeş from the media, but not Florida. In any other state they would only know thạt an assault occurred, but in Florida they ha
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    Text - 32,731 imachemicalkidx3 2 just-leave-me-with-my-cats O the-vashta-nerada: ALRIGHT SO IT'S 2:30 IN THE MORNING AND I WAS JUST ABOUT TO FALL ASLEEP AND THENI SAT UP AND ALMOST SCREAMED BECAUSE I WAS STRUCK WITH REALIZATION AND I DISCOVERED THE ULTIMATE TRUTH OF THE UNIVERSE TELETUBBIES ARE CALLED TELETUBBIES BECAUSE THEY HAVE TELEVISIONS IN THEIR STOMACHS Source: the-vashta-nerada torichampagne natmawtee perks-of-fangirling: thehippiejew: trickster-dave: armadilldo: I what if people had foo
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    Text - fluttertree-42 Follow 11 months out of the year: life is a trainwreck in december: life is a polar expresswreck #christmas #the polar express 258,412 notes
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    Text - marauders4evr Follow "Rudolph, with your nose so bright, won't you guide my sleigh tonight?" Then Rudolph told Santa and the other reindeer to get lost because you can't emotionally abuse someone for years and then ask them for a favor. The end. #aka how it should have happened #rudolph #rudolph the red nosed reindeer #Christmas #Christmas songs 211,853 notes
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    Text - mama-het Follow me: for christmas i want a dragon santa: be realistic me: ok i want boyfriend santa: what color do you want your dragon #dragon #AT LEAST I WILL HAVE DRAGON #dragons are cool #dragons are awesome #santa claus #boyfriend #christmas 276,373 notes ...
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    Text - sextronautt how can lawyers argue without crying lightspeedsound I am a lawyer and let me tell you It gets like super close dude Source: sextronautt <> 1,277,233 notes
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    Text - heart tumblr. Follow 2 plystation ME Wait What did i say again onyourtongue My life on snapchat Source:onyourtongue #TRU 197,242 notes ...
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    Text - rchy a silent mystery net: ask me anything I love oversharing im so a y #follow me on insta @traitor.s
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    Text - yungkawaiinigga: Can't cheat on your girl with those big ass galaxy phones she like "who the fuck is Brianna? reading over your shoulder from all the way on the 3rd floor. 101,697 notes
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    Text - i just saw someone on tumblr say they were born in 2004 and i choked you're all babies babies i say it's impossible anyone born in 2004 is 5 years old at most sarcasm-not-capitalism I was born in 2004 and l'm 14 Imao actualbrendonurie that's impossible 2004 was only 5 years ago you are a mere baby please return
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    Text - 2 cobaltdays *sticks my bare ass in a sewer opening* oh no l sure hope no demon clown tries to eat my a virgoassbitch I'm on hold with time warner cable getting my WiFi shut off because this post was the last straw for me
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    Text - T curseworm catholic school speedrun curseworm during the first liturgy if you slap the communion wine out of the priests hands and collapse at his feet hollering in tongues you can clip right through the floor and go straight to hell paulsimonsass69 funny story when my dad was in catholic school the teacher said "the only true swear word is the lord's name in vain" and my dad replied "so does that mean you can say ass" so he got whipped with a ruler Source: curseworm
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    Text - O bull-shipping what are the strongest days of the week? bull-shipping saturday and sunday. the rest are weekdays. bull-shipping stop unfollowing me Source: 43ketchup 366,324 notes
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    Product - thedailylaughs lolsleeping Follow feeritl Ejey swe fad Trigon Intermalionatine. prefers HERE SALE ON meladoodle i really want to buy one of these grocery checkout dividers but the lady behind the counter keeps putting it back vaspim This is like the most innocent joke l've ever read 310,755 notes
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    Text - fuck-you-im-an-adult saltpillar O Source: mangacartahol... louisgoddamntomlinson: softoogami: found a Nice Guy? dont friendzone him. end zone him. throw him on the ground like an effing football. touchdown nice guy finally scores 292,617 notes
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    Text - taylorskys: 14 notes reply Come over to Myspace and Twitter my Yahoo till I Google all over your Facebook ;D Anonymous Then i can push you down the stairs and watch you tumblr down. Ask taylorskys a question
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    Text - fairlyovenparents 46 can u draw? Anonymous This is one of my most famous. It's called "house and sun" Ask fairlyevenparents a question #Anonymous #ask
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    Text - 23 HILARIOUS tumblr. TEXT POSTS 66 P Aa hi!
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    Text - A glumshoe Pillow 1: beneath my head Pillow 2: between my knees Pillow 3: the huggin' pillow Pillow 4: against my back to anchor me to this plane of reality glumshoe pillows 5-8 do not have formalized roles but are able to arrange themselves into a nest as needed
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    Text - shaycarl @shaycarl Girls! Leave something to the imagination. Boys don't want to marry girls that all the dudes are lusting after. Your body is sacred. Tyler Oakley @tyleroakley @shaycarl Maybe we shouldn't slut-shame and body-police and assume woman's purpose is to fulfull a man's preferences. iamcrown: Tyler a the-glitter-clit 2,196 notes Jul 10th, 2018 boredpanda.com
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    Text - THE FUUUD COMICS (COLLECTION OF THE FUNNIEST THINGS FOUND ON THE INTERNET) TOP POSTS ASK CREATE SUBMIT RANDOM 2013-03-24 120.963 notes The Fuuu Comics (thetucomics.com) is a website consisting of all the funny memes and rage comics which you can find on the internet Google UPDATED DAILY TO KEEP Australia YOU ENTERTAINED UPLOAD NOw me and google are so close we finish each others ser OTHER BLOGS: sentences Google Search Pem Feeling Lucky
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    Text - Girl 911: what's the problem? Girl: omg i can't even today Girl 911: have you tried posting "worst day ever" and then replying to everyone commenting "i don't wanna talk about it"? 0. +++++ funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrposts funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrpost memeaccount joke jokes lol hilarious hilariousmemes funnyaccount funnyposts hehe haha cleanaccount quotes books fangirl fangirling harrypotter bookstagram
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    Text - panty-fallen-angel reblogged mattiesgaybreakfast 35,189 So there's only one channel in this motel, madeofmetals: This morning while I was getting ready I was watching Sesame Street. They were doing this bit where some clown was trying to wash his hands but kept washing his feet or his elbows and Elmo would go, “no mister noodle, your HANDSI" and all the tv kids would laugh. Around the fourth or fifth time he couldn't find his hands, I heard a grown man yell from somewhere else in the mote
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    Design - MR.GREY WILL SEE YOU NOW SPACE NEEDLEI! DOWNTOWNIL VALENTINE'S DAY 2015 FIFTYSHADESMOVIE.COM FOCUS ....... end SPACE NEEDLE! Mr. Grey's apt?7777 withehe Seattle DOWNTOWN Cogle
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    Text - Hannah Durant @hdurant I saw a girl carrying a hamster so I asked if I could pet it but it was actually a muffin so I'm on my way to jump of a cliff now DM memes-text posts to be featured 0• +++++ funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrposts funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrpost memeaccount joke jokes lol hilarious hilariousmemes funnyaccount funnyposts hehe haha cleanaccount cleanhilarious funnyaccount funnytumblr relatabl
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    Text - I need feminism because still charged 5% tax I'm Sanitary products because on they're classed as non-essential by the government.. perfectedbymyflaws: thelastmellophone: mischievouslaufeyson: sktagg23: whoneedsfeminism: I need feminism because l'm still charged 5% tax on sanitary products because they're classed as 'non-essential' by the government. What the motherfuck. Solve this by bleeding on everything they love. *AGGRESSIVELY PROJECTILE BLEEDING AT POLITICIANS ARE YOU FEELING IT NOW,
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    Product - tehjeff I don't like using my dad's bathroom because I'm not that into watching myself poop. sydneythesignificant i thought your face was embroidered on a hand towel 171,115 notes
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    Text - i remember one time this dude sent me a shirtless pic with the caption "lol maybe u can save this for a rainy day ;)" and i was like "for what? to keep me dry? because that's what it's doing right now"
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    Text - H) НOOKER FURNITURE christianmakesjokes christianmakesjokes: | hello yes, I would like to purchase one night stand. Cmon guys 6 notes are you kidding me this is like the funniest thing that ever happened in my life.
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    Vertebrate - keeby1: bridle-less: craigslisthorses: So, when it rained a lot the other day the front pasture got pretty flooded and when I called the babes up for breakfast Houdini was walking around the "pond" and went to go stand on his board that he loves to stand on and it started to move and that's the story of probably the first horse who ever surfed. surfdini You can lead a horse to water... but you didn't know he'd be shredding fucking waves
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    Text - “I am completely out of original and not at all cliché ideas" Every writer ever • +++++ funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrposts funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrpost memeaccount joke jokes lol hilarious hilariousmemes funnyaccount funnyposts hehe haha cleanaccount quotes books fangirl fangirling harrypotter bookstagram book fandom
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    Text - i dont understand why people need to do drugs or party in order to have fun, have you tried mac n cheese DM memes-text posts to be featured 0• +++++ funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrposts funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrpost memeaccount joke jokes lol hilarious hilariousmemes funnyaccount funnyposts hehe haha cleanaccount cleanhilarious funnyaccount funnytumblr relatable
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    Face - S Miranda Sings CAT EYE MAKEUP TUTORIAL! von Miranda Sings a vor 9 Stunden • 270.106 Aufrufe I teach u how to do the perfet cat eye make up today. its relly good so. cat eye makeup TUTORIAL 2:56 burriton: i really don't know what i expected
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    Text - ironmanarlert: u can run u can hide but u can't change the fact that scooby doo's real name is scoobert doo comment suggestions on how I can make this account better DM memes-text posts to be featured • +++++ funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrposts funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrpost memeaccount joke jokes lol hilarious hilariousmemes funnyaccount funnyposts hehe haha cleanaccount cleanhilarious funnyaccount funnytum
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    Cat - james X OJamesConquer Love is in the air Awwww scute · 00000• +++++ funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrposts funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrpost memeaccount joke jokes lol hilarious hilariousmemes funnyaccount funnyposts hehe haha cleanaccount cute adorable cats kittens
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    Cartoon - As I knock, knock, knock,
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    Text - un-feuilly-de-papier: un-feuilly-de-papier: What do french people call a really bad thursday? a trajeudi aerostarmonk: The man entered his home and was absolutely delighted when he discovered someone had stolen every lamp in the house. oh my god i just do not understand this post what even This post makes me so angry
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    Text - frogmunist I'm sure this has been asked before but would vampires drink period blood, and more importantly would the clumps just be a bonus for them? snarthurt ever had bubble tea? zsnes im going to hurt all of you im going to hit both of you with a heavy rock Source: frogmunist 15,034 notes
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    Text - eggsnogging: in my senior drama class i had to play gordon ramsay for a film project but we could only film in school so we had to try to find a closed off room to use. the thing is the room wasn't exactly soundproof and apparently someone heard us and that's the story of how the vice principal and four freshmen walked in on me wearing a chef's hat and yelling at my friend because her squid was so raw i could still hear it telling spongebob to fuck off did you get an A
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    Text - landorus lets have phone sex over walkie talkies weepingdildo "I'll make you moan, over" rninor "bend over" "bend what? over" Source: kelvinbenjamin 483,289 notes Literally Just 22 Hilarious Tumblr Posts About Sex
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    Text - hipsterinatardis: snowmercury: hauntedpamplemousse: orcasoup: those moments when straight people assume you're one of them and you feel like a gay secret agent lesbionage bi spy it's an ace case Secret gaygent.
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    Text - exitmusicforafilmm: crypticrose: c-aramelize: bur-gund-y: c-aramelize: living-afairytale: C-aramelize: so oxygen went on a date with potassium today...it went ok. i thought oxygen was dating magnesium...omg actually oxygen first asked nitrogen out, but nitrogen was all like "NO" I thought oxygen had that double bond with the hydrogen twins looks like someone's a HO NaBro I'm done with all of you
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    Text - heartofdicksy person: she-- me: it's he. person: *condescending smile* well, on your birth certificate-- me: yeah, it also says ' 81bs, 6 oz ' -- a lot has changed over the years #LGBTQ #transgender #ftm 56,497 notes
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    Text - Follow as-pec-ta-bund Friend: "For an Asexual your mind is pretty pervy" Me: ... Friend: ... Me: "For a straight male you're pretty quick to point out a penis joke." Friend: ... #text post #asexual #asexual awareness #LGTBQA #gay #lol #funny 244 notes
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    Text - its-an-everything a lame-blogger 73,961 tibets: whale-bone: tibets: | Mac Bath WAS THIS REALLY WORTH THE JOKE yea Source: tibets
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    Fictional character - Your fave is problematic: Bruce Banner
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    Face - One of the kids in my class was born on April Fool's and his Dad missed his birth because when his mom called to say she was in labour, he laughed and hung up on her.
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    Text - paradiseandfood: ok so my mums friend has had her snake for over 8 years and has treated it as a child, it slept next to her and everything. the snake started acting differently and started to sleep straight instead of curled up, she thought something was wrong so she took it to the vet and the vet had to send someone to collect the snake because the snake was sizing himself up to her BECAUSE HE WAS PLANNING ON EATING HER THE NEXT DAY
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    Washing machine - memeberd pwease hewp me i 'm DWOWNING 30 Funny Tumblr Posts
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    Text - me: oh you don't wanna reply for an hour? guess I'm not replying for an hour eith- -DING- me: BURN BOOK comment suggestions on how I can make this account better DM memes-text posts to be featured • +++++ funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrposts funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrpost memeaccount joke jokes lol hilarious hilariousmemes funnyaccount funnyposts hehe haha cleanaccount cleanhilarious funnyaccount funnytumblr
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    Text - es-tea-enne: noncanadiansatan: bertismylife: vickisaurusrex: cute names for ur newborn child o yeehaw o hte Spaghetti lil shit o swiggity swoner i have a boner o genocide come on (5), we're gonna be late how is that pronounced
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    Muscle - Breaking News LIVE Man too stupid to use hat TVN EXCLUSIVE chrishemsperf: chrishemsperf I've been laughing at this for 50 years each note is another year i will be laughing at this 489,109 notes
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    Text - 50shadesofneigh 2 darth-sayder + Source: partybarackisi... partybarackisinthehousetonight: i can't believe this, i thought what we had was special. you met my family and made me dinner. now all of a sudden you claim you're a "waiter" and you're just "doing your job" 91,036 notes
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    Text - oaksy texas confession i've never seen snow irl oaksy i posted this and it snowed like two inches a week later for the first time in like 35 years wtf oaksy texas confession i've never had a million dollars Trending Source: oaksy 42,786 notes 51 Hilarious Tumblr Posts That Are All Funny, No Filler
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    Text - 12 I let my boyfriend punch me in the stomach.. I just like the feeling ok! He just kept punching me and omg the feeling! The next thing i knew I puked in his face. A bit of carrot was in it and he threw it at me! Things are so awkward between us now:'( help me! Anonymous what the hell._. Ask maximerosalie a question
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    Face - desirebenedict Follow Me before The Last Jedi: I can't stand Kylo Ren Me after The Last Jedi: I would literally travel to the ends of the earth to protect my son Kylo Ren
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    Text - castleismyoneanddone: theraginazian: desmond-the-creppy-bear: srsfunny: Soft rocks.. can you imagine though you send your enemies a rather large amount of these in various sizes. you leave no return address or explanation. they open all the boxes to discover these wondrous pillows. they are reluctant to keep them but eventually they give in and integrate them into their home like the above pictures. after a few weeks or even months, theyve gotten accustomed to having them in their home an
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    Text - mintycoolnessisrelevant I've got a new word for fanfic writers to use, brought to you by todays word of the day: Dictionary.com WORD OF THE DAY MARCH 17, 2017 smaragdine adjective [smuh-RAG-din] 1. emerald-green in color. 2. of or relating to emeralds. example sentence: she gazed into his smaragdine orbs mmilhouse obama chuckled. "you mean the chaos smaragdines?"
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    Cartoon - the very best vegan MEMES onlybuyvegan.com
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    Text - serlous-booty milesjai 212 delete edit Being gay is a sin. Anonymous .sinsational. gingerduckling: This will forever be my favourite post on tumblr.
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    Text - tomhiddlebum crackowens Source: queerpong cutieringtail: falmyrion: queerpong: "YOUR GAY" they shouted. "DUDE YOUR GAY!" i ignored them. it wasnt until i got home that i realized my gay had escaped. they tried to tell me. You're* JOKE YOU 168,252 notes
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    Text - Spell to Get Someone to Leave You the Fuck Alone curlicuecal: ignescent: sleepydryad: Materials: o salt Throw salt at your intended target and say, "Stay the fuck away from me." If it doesn't work the first time, repeat and aim for the eyes. If this continues to fail, track down one of those Himalayan salt lamps that are basically a 6lb pointy rock and start hitting them with it until they go away. Anything can be a spell of unconsciousness if you throw it hard enough
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    Scientist: there's been a decline of basic white girls posting on Instagram Starbucks: say no more Omo wad 0. +++++ funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrposts funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrpost memeaccount joke jokes lol hilarious hilariousmemes funnyaccount funnyposts hehe haha cleanaccount quotes books fangirl fangirling harrypotter bookstagram book fandom
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    Text - crown-queen-bambee tumblr. Follow 2 himchansthickgf aviolafyre "Makeup is false advertising!" Oh that's funny. Because l'm not a product. And I'm not trying to sell myself to you. fresh-princess-of-gallifrey you can hear the mic drop crown-queen-bambee All of this Source:aviolafyre #Makeup 457,074 notes
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    Text - David Hughes @david8hughes [at the mall] "Excuse me? I lost my son. Can I please make an announcement?" "Of course." [leans in to mic] "Goodbye you little shit." Source:best-of-memes 362,916 notes
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    Text - neutraldankhotel you: "eats 100 ears of corn in two hours* I am the corn king! I cannot be outcorned me: *eats 101 ears of corn in ten minutes* just another day in the corn fields 10inchflaccid what? neutraldankhotel I don't know. i woke up at 6am, wrote this, and went back to sleep
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    Text - alphabitches sexting boys is so fun because they get so into it and you're like cleaning your kitchen or something Source:afk 640,250 notes
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    Text - Follov tumblr. oheejunss Relative: so you got a boyfriend yet? ;) ;) ;) me: haha yeah Relative: Oh wow really?! I want to meet him! me: haha so do i Relative: Relative: wait what me: /sobbing in a corner/ #this will probably happen #kpop #exo #bts #bap #vixx #b2st #shinee #super junior #monsta x #seventeen #big bang #got7 #infinite 4,639 notes
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    Text - tumblr. popularculturevulture Follow LIKE THS What girls look for in guys brown eyes • messy hair cute nose • 4 paws golden retriever 484,859 notes
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    Text - tumblr. Follow pornstarch i hate when ur boob starts falling out of ur bra like excuse me ma'am please return to your assigned seat #my post 443,855 notes
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    Text - E SHAKESPEARE QUOTE OF THE DAY An SSL error has occurred and a secure connection to the server cannot be made. jlmorrison @ lmorrison y Follow I think it's from one of the Henry's 8:32 PM - 1 Jan 2017 sorry for not posting i just dont feel like doing anything ~ir + X + X + { meme memes textpost textposts funny savage savageaf hilarious dank dankmemes triggered edgy memegod memelord pepe 420meme memesdaily lol cringe text tumblr funnytumblr relatable funnytextpost funnytextposts tumblrquot
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    Text - sixpennies: gelfing: givemealthebaconandeggs Icelandic sheep Where are they GOING TO VALHALLA They fly | (Check link in bio!) funnyfriday funnytumblr tumblr funny tumblrtextpost funnytumblrtextpost funny haha humor hilarious
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    Text - cockmcstuffins bella was lucky she didn't have a cell phone of any kind because you know ya boi edward would be blowing up that phone 24-7 going "saw a snail today.... effervescent" or some shit equivalent
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    Text - stop saying i can't even and start saying i can even believe in urself Follow your dreams is that a lawn mower flying no, it's a lawn mower following it's dreams STRANGEBEAVER.com
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    Text - his-quietus-make I once took my kids to a local farm and we found a lil goat with its horns stuck in a fence, just sitting there kinda mournfully on the grass. We tried to help it get free but it was stuck tight. We petted it for a while and fed it some grass (as it had lawnmowered a circle around itself as far as it could reach), and then went back to the ticket office to tell them it needed help, but before l'd said more than: "There's a goat-" the guy cut me off with a weary wave and s
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    Product - tumblr. harrishun Follow Mark Zuckerberg Stu 10 hrs · Palo Alto, CA, United States · One more down, thousands to go. Share Like Comment what a vague and potentially concerning caption
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    Text - thats-slightly-raven: I JUST BURNT MY HAND ON MY LAMP TRYING TO TURN IT OFF LAMPS SHOULD NOT BE HOT ENOUGH TO GIVE YOU THIRD DEGREE BURNS THIS IS BULLSHIT. maybe if you'd go outside and used natural sunlight instead of running your lamp for 13 hours straight, this wouldn't happen :) OH I'M SORRY IT'S 3:38AM LET ME JUST WAKE UP THE SUN SO I CAN SIT OUTSIDE WITH MY SKINLESS BURNT HAND AND BASK IN THE GLORY OF NATURAL DAYLIGHT.
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    Text - brightindie Three stages of life: 1. Birth 2. WHATTHE FUCKI S THIS 3. Death Source: brightindie #fave;
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    Text - whetavar Me: dangling hand off bed Demon: *grabs it* Me: what are we Source:spite 587,566 notes
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    Text - geopunk: sloth-grunge: geopunk: geopunk: what is it called when u kill a friend homiecide murder homiecide
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    Text - danfreakindavis snorlaxatives D chlotana: baby-youremyliquor: chlotana: why isn't "so....yeah." an acceptable conclusion on a 10 page paper I've not really ever had Starbucks... Someone take me? literally what the fuck 158,257 notes
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    Text - 25 C NIGHT ONE COUGH SYRUP SOL TRADE MARK EACH OUNCE CONTAINS ALCOHOL,(lessthan 1%)- CANNABIS INDICA,F.E., CHLOROFORM, MORPHIA,SULPH, 4%m 4%m. 2sm Yegr SKILLFULLY COMBINED WITH A NUMBER OF OTHER INGREDIENTS DIRECTIONS DoSr On enenoonful three brendonbrandon: she-who-shall-not-be-laid: mhalachai: patrickthomson: this is your periodic reminder that old-timey medicines did not fuck around Yeah that'd probably handle a cough. "skillfully combined with a number of other ingredients" what else
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    Text - meladoodle i wanna be a reverse tooth fairy where i rob people and then scatter human teeth on their bed firelorcl a dentist turkey-imported-from-maine i dont know what your dentist is doing to you but i think you need to go to the police
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    Text - devipotato i'm watching a sports devipotato the sports did good devipotato oldroots Did the ball go fuck dude it sure did Source: devipotato
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    Text - Ray McArthur I clicked it. Nothing happened? I think it's safe 3 hrs Unlike 63 Ray MCArthur WOW! Guess what! I just got a free iPhone 7! All you have to do is login into www.freeprizes.com enter your name, address, phone number, and social security and you get a free prize! Search Results for "onlineprizes.net" onlineprizes.net 3 hrs Unlike 63 gnorbue this kind of reminds me of how in zombie movies when someone gets bit and it doesnt kick in straight away toocooltobehipster THIS IS MY FAV
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    Text - afro-elf marvel where's my ten minute video of thor teaching earth etiquette to the asgardians??? afro-elf "this is a dog" [a bunch of hands fly up] "you cannot ride it, it is too small" [all hands go down]
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    Text - HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEEE HAHA PAHA HA HA pollylabruja me getting ready to go out venuselectrificata someone who does photoshop reverse this hippity-hoppity-brigade HAHA MA THEE HEE HEE HAA HA matt-the-blind-cinnamon-roll Me getting home from work classwarshawty HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE Source: monsterman 205,689 notes
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    Text - schmergo: asmilinggoddess: fun fact: the word "panic" is actually from the greek word "panikos" which is referring to the greek god pan who apparently shout at people who were alone in the woods and freak them out. Career goals
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    Text - sarcassie tumblr. 2 mydrunkkitchen 7:48 Why Black Holes are not Scary by Sharkee 350,512 views · 2 years ago maximumbuttitude sounds like something a black hole would say
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    Text - omegajako: historical-nonfiction: Bugs Bunny accidentally transformed the word nimrod into a synonym for idiot because nobody got a joke where he sarcastically compared Elmer Fudd to the Biblical figure Nimrod, a mighty hunter. Etymology is ridiculous and terrifying sometimes Source: dailywritingtips.com 2 62,745 notes T1
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    Text - putting tape over my Webcam thinking about how the CIA agent watched me cry everyday for a year and didn't once check up one me: cut toxic people out in 2018
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    Text - E intranet Me, when I buy 24 roombas and an amazon alexa Me: Alexa, unleash the roombas *24 roombas emerge slowly from under my bed, consuming everything in their path* Source: intranet
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    Text - Open in tumblr. partybarack. "I OBJECT!" the defendant screams in court. the judge gives him a very emotional hug and says "no.you human" #when did tha thappen Imao #100k #tp 229,004 notes Stay awake at FUNSubstance.com
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    Text - westcoastsweetheart oprahchopra a 14,173 doubledamnit: ironinomicon: | look at my face you think this is a fucking game Source: Ironinomicon EVERYTHINGFUNNY.ORG
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    Text - galaxyslime swear words are illegal now. if you say one you'll be fined. breadisticks heck galaxyslime you're on thin fucking ice galaxyslime oh no
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    Text - jaclcfrost "you'll understand when you're older" i am older and i understand absolutely nothing A cbeamsglitter #i actually understand less
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    Vertebrate - rollinginthepeep pachurz partyintheusanus HAVE YOU EVER SEEN A SHAVED RABBIT Put a hat on it and ask it to bust myths. THAT COMMENT HOLY SHIT EVERYTHINGFUNNY.ORG
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    Text - fergzillar Some dude: Hey bro you got the time? Me: Yeah it's fuckinuuuuuh [pulls a cat out of the inside of my jacket and looks it dead in the eyes] about 6pm lumpawaroospaceprincess Context: Needle Seed 12 10 Egg 18 Ball, 6. A.M.P.M. empirefarts I thought this was some shitpost and I just accepted it Source: fergchillar 169,007 notes
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    Text - Teenager Post# 3505 O Taken O Single V Mentally dating a celebrity that has no idea l exist. /teenagerposts.tumblr.com Me funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrposts funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrpost memeaccount joke jokes lol hilarious hilariousmemes funnyaccount funnyposts hehe haha cleanaccount
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    Text - Teenager Post # 4238 When you and your friends have code names for people you hate. l/teenagerposts.tumblr.com QOTP comment yessss below an inside joke you have with a friend accurate clean cleanmeme cleanmemes comedy cute dank dankmeme dankmemes funny ha haha hilarious kawaii kawaiimeme kawaiimemeteam lol me meme memes omg pun puns relatable tbh true tumblr tumblrpost tumblrposts wow
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    Text - thankyu a clownboy (half clown, half cowboy) says yeehonk foxy-mulder this is it. the worst post i've ever seen. my own two eyes are cursed I had to read this, so do you 0. +++++ funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrposts funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrpost memeaccount joke jokes lol hilarious hilariousmemes funnyaccount funnyposts hehe haha cleanaccount quotes books fangirl fangirling harrypotter bookstagram book fando
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    Text - That one follower that likes everything you post I have -0 people that like ever post . O... funny lol Imao hilarious humor love jokes fun nochill laugh follow Imfao meme instagood memes followme haha funnyshit like4like music bruh niggasbelike comedian ctfu tumblr repost movie bitchesbelike dead instafunny
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    Text - Ing education technology, overwrought fears about technology have proven equally exaggerated. Those apprehensive about computer-assisted tutoring or online instruction would do well to keep in mind that such concerns have greeted almost any new learning tool. Dave Thornburg and David Dwyer, for instance, offer up a list of past complaints in their book Rethinking Education in the Age of Technology: The Digital Revolution and Schooling in America. From today's vantage point, some of the co
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    News - HAPPY ITTLETRES This guy in my political science class was watching a Bob Ross video and following along in MS Paint
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    Cartoon - So my girlfriends sock was lying on the ground inside out and I was afraid I'd wake her up from laughing so hard.
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    Text - destielcockblock: messy-hair-and-yellow-masks: destielcockblock: ave-aria: ghettoffmylawn: methfab: what kind of shoes does a thief wear? Sneakers The world truly needs more shoe puns. Take this joke and run with it. this joke definitely has legs what kind of shoes does a peodophile wear? White Vans there was no sole in that
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    Text - Knock, knock. Who's there? knock Knock who? I am Knocking Кисс 1. billcosplay: i had a book when i was a kid where u could write ur own knock knock jokes and im still laughing at it
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    Text - tiger-in-the-flightdeck The lack of context here is thrilling tag a friend and comment your hogwarts house memes-text posts to be DM featured • • +++++ funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrposts funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrpost memeaccount joke jokes lol hilarious hilariousmemes funnyaccount funnyposts hehe haha cleanaccount cleanhilarious funnyaccount funnytumblr relatable
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    Text - #TransLOL
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    Text - Source: egberts lesphantomoffleetstreet e llamasaremyfavcolour calliestrider: un-leash-ing: egberts: *goes to a party and awkwardly follows friend around the entire time" "goes to a family reunion and awkwardly follows mom around the entire time" *goes to hell and awkwardly follows satan the entire time* 860,290 notes
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    Text - ULIVIA @oliviawilde olivia wilde o in a thousand years archeologists will dig up tanning beds and think we fried people as punishment. 14 May via web Favorite 23 Retweet 6 Reply
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    Dress - Guys are usually standing next to their dates or hodling their hands, or even their hip; but then there's Will Smith.
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    People - DO YOU HAVE ANY DOWN LOWS? FREE HIGH FIVES FREE HIGH FIVES FREE HIGH FIVES YOu WERE TOO SLOW. SORRY, I'M ALL OUT. DANG. FREE HIGH FIVES FREE HIGH FIVES FREE HIGH FIVES Cyanide and Happiness © Explosm.net
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    Text - itssexualhour: I went to see hamlet and the guy playing hamlet was rather cute and had a lot of shirtless scenes going on and so I stared at him and tried to make eye contact until he caught my eye and I wiggled my eyebrow and he broke character and smiled and after that I would catch him glancing my way and after the play was over he came into the lobby and pulled me into his dressing room and that is how I lost my virginity to someone with his own Wikipedia page
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    Text - peachvenom: periods help you learn how to get blood off of things which is probably why you hear more stories of men caught with murder
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    Text - Ashley C. Ford @iSmashFizzle A teacher friend went over safety procedures with her class & asked, "If I'm shot, what do you do?" One of her students said, "Avenge you." 9/14/16, 9:22 PM
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    Text - sonicskullsalt: i always see posts making fun of quatre-vingt-dix-neuf meaning 99 and the French numeric system in general but have you ever seen the French for What is that? it's qu'est-ce que c'est? and it literally translates to what is this that this is?
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    Text - 000 Optus ? 1:23 am Hayley YOU MATCHED WITH HAYLEY ON 17/5/17. My body has 206 bones. Want to give me another one? 2 Jun 2017, 1:04 am If you're referring to my penis it's not a bone but a muscle And the only muscle I'm willing to give you is my heart Wow that's cute Cool let's Fuck Cool! Let's do it. Where are you from Send Type a Message... GIF
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    Text - 12:17 1 ull Updates OPDATC Dec 2, 2017 Get ready for Christmas with Santa and Elf masks! more GoodRx - Save On GoodR Prescriptions UPDATE Dec 1, 2017 For this update, we updated the app from version 5.0.2 to 5.0.3. That means we literally deleted the number 2 and changed it to 3. And that's pretty much it. We spent Thanksgiving binge-watching Stranger Things and mining Bitcoin, but the boss says "Make sure you release a new version every 2 weeks!"....so, here we are. Expect another update
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    Cartoon - Self-depreesting memes that aren't funny and do nothing but make yeur friends werry about you. Me
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    Organism - After a long day of pretending to like peoplee lex @thelexibart me after using my customer service voice all day
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    Text - NASA NASA @NASA We used to have 9 planets but we now only have 8. 10:03 AM - 13 Dec 17 MEME VOINA 255 Retweets 6,000 Likes Pluto o @notsolostplanet - 7h Replying to @NASA Stop telling everyone I'm not a planet! 27 49 458 NASA O @NASA · 6h NASA Replying to @notsolostplanet Sometimes we can hear the voices. t7 800 2,599 O
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    Cooktop - tumblr. Follow blawkywolf BlawkyWolf BlawkyWolf IM CRYINF AT MY OWN SICK JOKE AND I SHOULDNT BE, WHAT HAVE I DONE #pokemon jokes #pokemon meme #pokemon go #PokemonGo #Pokemon #pidgey #cooking #eggs #sick humor #what have I done #SAVE ME 86,932 notes
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    Text - thedrearydeer: have you ever realized that the eyebrow hair on a dog never ends dogs are covered in eyebrow hair dogs are walking eyebrows they are eyebrows Source: thedrearydeer 61,211 notes
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    Text - App developer - Los Angeles, CA Posted by Barry E. on 1/21/2016 Start date: ASAP $99.00 per hour 5+ children (Infant, Toddler, Preschool, Elementary, Junior High) 10 miles away (Los Angeles, CA) I am barry and i need help with my life be my nanny l'm and 44 and don't know what to do please come help Barry E. Apply to This Job:
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    Text - Source:zo0ophagous the-imgurian sarahsarahpearl The pet owners dilemma zooophagous: Are you sick or just resting Why won't you eat Are you dead or asleep... oh sorry you were asleep sorry I bugged you What do you have in your mouth, oh God spit it out 25,348 notes ...
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    Text - dumbasian why is bruno mars so weird about some girl opening her eyes while shes kissing him ive been meaning to ask this question since 2010 dumbasian Dr Phil asked: How did bruno know her eyes where open unless his where too ? this ask made me open my third eye pacificrim why the fuck is doctor phil asking you this STRANGEBEAVER.con
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    Text - boxqueen: vrixie: irisannwest: do you ever do you ever just have that one class that one freaking class that just depresses you when you think about it because oh god you hate it so much The bourgeoisie Get out.
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    Text - 20 EXIT chekhov: deepbreathsanddeath: This is a real panda! China has this "panda diplomacy" and this one will be sent to Japan as an friendship envoy. For the safety reason he sits as a passenger with his feeder, not in a cage. Fastening the seat belt, wearing a diaper, eating bamboos You can't bring a full shampoo bottle on a plane but you can bring a bear?
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    Dog - wojtekghost princekenkaneki O Source: trust trust: when ur outfit on point but ur plans get cancelled 108,690 notes
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    Text - Source:zo0ophagous the-imgurian sarahsarahpearl The pet owners dilemma zooophagous: Are you sick or just resting Why won't you eat Are you dead or asleep... oh sorry you were asleep sorry I bugged you What do you have in your mouth, oh God spit it out 25,348 notes ...
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    Text - darthsquidious: My four year old cousin is freaking out because we went to a restaurant and the forks had three prongs instead of four Every time someone said the word "fork" she said "no it's a threek" I can't wait for this kid to be old enough to use tumblr More awesome pics at FUNSubstance.com FUNSubstance
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    Conversation - 00 888
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    Text - The Jewish-Japanese Sex and Cookbook and How to Raise Wolves JACK DOUGLAS įwunderbread: wastetheday | A lot covered in one book. where have you been, jack douglas what kind of things have you seen
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    Text - thomas-world: pierce-alexandria-with-sirens that-stupid-tardis-sound: words i use in every sentence: • no • stop o dude • literally • like • seriously o fuck That's a sentence right there Forwards and backwards You can rearrange them in any order and it'll be a sentence ladies and gentlemen the extensive vocabulary of tumblr
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    Text - readalot413: liverpate: azraeldoesnotdispute: liverpate: |why am i not a banana Because your genetic code dictates that you are human. However, it should please you to know that you share 50 - 60% of your DNA with a banana. thanks man are you telling me that some people are 10% more banana than other people
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    Text - pursuitofhapppinessss: ten-and-donna: dustbats: I'm on medication that can make me spacey af, which can be a problem when I'm driving-like yesterday, for example, when my best friend was trying to help me avoid a pothole he said "to the left," and I just mumbled "take it back now y'all" and hit the pothole straight on Literally crying this is my favorite post on this website STRANGEBEAVER.com
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    Text - jediteaparty: arauj0: aangnog: i just realized that "never" is a contraction of "not ever" and "blush" is a contraction of "blood rush" also "studying" is a contraction of "student dying"
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    Text - carry-on-my-wayward-butt: one time i saw someone skipping rocks and eating a sandwich along the beach and idk he just tossed his sandwich in the water and bit the rock and he just stiffened a bit but i saw him dying inside after realizing what had just happened
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    Text - I was so high I cried because I realized snakes are just tails with faces. Luke 14 puff (76) - pass (10) i by Cameron Nov 16, 2010 02:01 PM adriofthedead: weeaboo-chan: burrenbari: I LITERALLY AM WHEEZING RIGHT NOw SHIT THIS IS DISTRESSING
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    Text - When you go to a friend's house to stay the night and get stuck with the scratchy blanket. an-idiosyncratic-method: You know the one. It's made of wool. It has satiny trim that tries to deceive you into thinking this will be a nice blanket experience. But it's not. Every house has one. It's buried deep in the bowels of the linen closet, under some afghans and a comforter with the down coming out of it, but make no mistake. The scratchy blanket is there. And it waits.
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    Text - 51,962 lizthefangirl: asphyxion: i went to a high school where they played jeopardy music when you had about 30 seconds to get to class and i shit you not best part of i the day was seeing kids sprinting to class with this music playing what FREAKING HIGH SCHOOL WAS THAT
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    Text - when are you free Today 8:01 PM im forever imprisoned in my own personal hell so i am never truely "free" but i dont really have plans all next week except for monday okay but "comment your irthday to find your twin!!" posts annoy me and idk why - textpost textposts textpostfunny haha funny hilarious Imao same me relatable funnytextposts humor humour tumblr tumblrfunny tumblrquotes funnyposts tagyourself funnyaccount relatableposts meme hashtag shrek textpostaccount posts funnythings dank
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    Text - when you and your little brother running away from an ass whooping and he gets grabbed Oh shit fuck the brother then Like Follow for funny memes : funny lol Imao hilarious humor love jokes fun nochill laugh follow Imfao meme instagood memes followme haha funnyshit like4like music bruh niggasbelike comedian ctfu tumblr repost movie bitchesbelike dead instafunny
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    Text - when you find out your friend did as bad as you did on a test Gabrielle 0• +++++ funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrposts funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrpost memeaccount joke jokes lol hilarious hilariousmemes funnyaccount funnyposts hehe haha cleanaccount
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    Text - When you meet someone with the same name as you THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE There aren't very many Gabrielles smh - 000000 +++++ funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrposts funny clean cleanmemes meme memes funnymemes cleanfunny tumblr tumblrpost memeaccount joke jokes lol hilarious hilariousmemes funnyaccount funnyposts hehe haha cleanaccount
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    Text - zwinch a If youre ever feeling down just remember that 52K Australians have signed a petition to change the Australian currency to Dollarydoos source #australia #strays sthe simpsons #dollarydoos #hilarious #lol #funny #aussie 46 notes ...
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    Text - adam @brokeangel having friends is cool but have you ever cut everyone off and disappeared for 6 months 2017-11-16, 2:21 PM <>
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    Text - *over analyzes situation *immediately overreacts *everything turns out fine Me: Gthedryginger Oh dear, I do wish I hadn't cried so much.
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    Text - TOUCHY FRENCH-CANADIAN TEEN WHO GETS INCREASINGLY AGGRESSIVE AT PEOPLE WHO LAUGH AT HIMmily kidgaga94: psilentasincjelli: peanutsareforpussies: this one's pretty specific And yet even in this one still shot he's portraying it perfectly. are we all just going to ignore the fact that this is essentially justin bieber
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    Text - You seem a decent fellow. I hate to kill you. You seem a decent fellow. I hate to die. strlockedwhovian: hopelesslyhiddled: The most polite sword fight ever If Tom Hiddleston and Benedict Cumberbatch ever got in a fight. This movie.!!! is gold (Check link in bio!) funnyfriday funnytumblr tumblr funny tumblrtextpost funnytumblrtextpost funny haha humor hilarious theprincessbride
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    Text - a-jedi-in-polis Follow Who built King Arthur's Round Table? Sir Cumference #bad jokes #puns #history jokes #history 5,884 notes
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    Text - aclorable which country has the most birds aclorable portugeese aclorable wait skypestripper thats a language gordonjramsay portugull mitsurugi nice recovery giveme-brandy-onmybreath don't you mean nice redovery biological-warfare turkey, how did we miss turkey STAE
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    Text - w just-shower-thoughts How long does someone have to be dead before it's considered archeology instead of grave robbing? australopithecusrex as an archaeologist, i find this a veRY AWKWARD QUESTION witch-with-a-dick answer the question grave robber Source:just-shower-thoughts 459,758 notes
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    Text - sosyebabe What you got made fun of in school for? graatrunk i went into american public school for 6th grade and i pierced someone's scrotum with a fencing foil that was missing the little rubber safety tip on the end by accident in gym and it was middle school so i was promptly nicknamed "The Nut Slayer" and i cried until my parents let me move back to europe and live with my grandparents genghis-khanye nutslayer is a powerful title jakemorph can you imagine a european person coming to y
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    Text - penceyprepofficial: when I was like 9 my neighbors asked me to watch their fish and cat while they went on vacation and I was like "lol k" and while they were gone tHE FUCKING FISH DIED so when they got home I apologized to the mom and she was just like "no need to apologize, I turned the filter off so they would die because they are too much work. You did nothing wrong" and she gave me 20 bucks and that is the story of my first contracted murder
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    Text - the-masters-fallen-angel: geobytes: My grandma would always x out people in her yearbook and write "Deceased" when one of her high school classmates died. We often found it morbid. Grandma wanted to be the last one living. She wanted to win. That's not a yearbook. That's a hit list. EVERYTHINGFUNNY.ORG
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    Text - iPod 11:05 PM earth fuckyea-nirvana-gifs: earthandanimals: Hawaii is soon to become the first state in the US to enforce a plastic bag ban. The ban was passed at the county level in every county in the state. This is a great example of how small, local action can create big change. What the fuck are dolphins supposed to put their groceries in 63,709 notes laugh-addict EVERYTHINGFUNNY.ORG
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    Text - So I'm a lesbian and my older sister is always saying that I'm not really a lesbian, I just "haven't found the right man yet." Why do you think she says that? Anonymous misandry-mermaid: Ask her if she's sexually attracted to llamas, and if she says she isn't, tell her she just hasn't found the right llama yet. He's out there, waiting. Then bombard her with llama photos and tell her not to be such a fu ***** bigot. 53,684 notes EVERYTHINGFUNNY.ORG
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    Text - A artaline human: *is heating up food* alien: why are you doing that? human: you see i want the particles in my food to vibrate at just the right frequency dannydanuselessstuff Human: *is eating ice cream* alien: wait you forgot to make that one vibrate! human: well, you see, not with this food cardozzza This one is already vibrating at he desired frequency, but if it starts to vibrate at a higher frequency I lock it back in the cold box. W asgardreid Human: "just reheated pizza in the ov
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    Text - found in a physics text book he clearing on the north bank? (b) How long will the boat ake to cross the river and land in the clearing? Additional Problems 83 You are kidnapped by political-science majors (who are upset because you told them political science is not a real science). Although blindfolded, you can tell the speed of their car (by the whine of the engine), the time of travel (by men- johnskylar Physics majors throw a lot of shade considering they're still not sure where 95% o
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    Text - draeneis: junosunderland: draeneis: i think my favorite story is my bisexual friends father hating that she liked the same gender so he sent her to a catholic school an all girls school an enclosed space with nothing but girls I like to imagine him crossing his arms and thinking "why yes, this is a sound decision" "the perfect plan" Reinvented by Moodswings for iFunny :) O ifunny.co
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    Text - loserslol E cumfort + cinnamon-anemone: thequarantinedmailman: offonahuntingtrip: aegean-sea: | LOWERCASE LETTERS ARE FOR THE LOWER CLASS and here we have a capitalist Did you just. let us all take a moment to appreciate that all of human history and human language and the universe itself aligned to make this joke possible 802,417 notes
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    Cartoon - This one is different. He's honest and sweet, and wouldn't do anything to hurt me. HE'S A GUY. peacefullyy: aluc ardhellsing: noemail: bowtiesarecooltoo: I love watching Disney movies when you're older and come across scenes like this. I laughed for five minutes. Hades was the original sassy gay friend. Of course he is the sassy gay friend, look at him he flaming. this post is perfect
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    Text - Allowed "Youruined it Yahoo. I don't even n want to use Tumblr if it's going to c I be run by you," wrote one Tumblr blogger whose screen name can't be printed in a family newspaper. Not Allowed Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure h
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    Text - sahraobsessed 2 playazindaback B Source: lurkerpi horussebooks: mr-egbutt: lurkerpi: please stop adding 'there are two kinds of people' and 'that escalated quickly' to text posts there are two kinds of rapid escalation well that peopled twicely #Tumblr 28,891 notes
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    Text - thank-you-vashappenin-man im... Source: cutelildork cutelildork: cutelildork: MY DAD IS WATCHING BRIDGE TO TERABITHIA IN THE OTHER ROOM AND HE JUST RAN IN WITH TEARS IN HIS EYES AND YELLED "WHAT KIND OF DISNEY MOVIE KILLS KIDS" THEN WENT BACK HE CAME INTO THE KITCHEN AND HES MUMBLING STUFF LIKE "yeah... fine... kill the kid. ill all the kids. who cares. waste of time." 90,647 notes thank-you-vashappenin-man 2 mi.. O Source: shalrath strifeanddeath: shalrath: But i'm a crepe i'm a weirdoug

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